Sunday, July 19, 2009


Well Mississippi was in the news again. Come on Mississippi what are we doing here? I mean I KNOW we like to eat. Lord knows momma can cook better than any resturaunt you step foot in but do we REALLY want to have this weighing on our shoulders. I have decided this week I am NOT going to be a statistic anymore. I am working really hard to eat better. Life is too short! I will be 30 next month and I want to enjoy my 30's and not be miserable the whole time.

I hereby dedicate myself to at least 30 minutes of exercise daily!!

Come on Mississippi...Let's Go Walking!!!!

Friday, July 17, 2009

Life List

Just an update:

Places To Visit:
New York
Grand Canyon
Venice Italy
Rome Italy
Madrid Spain
Key West
Pennsylvania - Hershey Park & Historical Sites
Bora Bora

Things I Would Like To Do or Learn In My Lifetime:
Play the Piano
Play the Guitar
Fly A Plane
Go on A Cruise
Rock Climbing
Hike Up A Mountain
Snow Ski
Speak Spanish
Learn Sign Language
Swim with Dolphins
Fly in A Helicopter
Fly in A Hot Air Balloon
Finish Nursing School
Get some sort of degree (if not in nursing)
Start A Business
Write a Book
Go to the Oprah Show!
Ride Horseback on the beach!
Pay off 4-Wheeler!
Sell Brian's Truck!
Pay off Tahoe!
Pay off old Credit Card Bills!

Around The House
Organize my closets
Clip & Organize articles out of my old magazines and toss magazines!
Paint my bedroom
Paint my kitchen
Paint my living area
Organize all of my pictures
Scan all pictures in and put the on CD's
Get backyard fenced!
Organize & paint laundry room
Organize all cabinets – bathroom & kitchen
Organize Baylee's room….again!!

Books to Read or Read Again (In 2009):
Dear John – Nicholas Sparks
At First Sight – Nicholas Sparks
Three Weeks With My Brother – Nicholas Sparks
True Believer – Nicholas Sparks
The Wedding - Nicholas Sparks
Predator – Patricia Cornwell
Trace – Patricia Cornwell
I Heard That Song Before – Mary Higgins Clark
No Place Like Home – Mary Higgins Clark
Ghost Ship – Mary Higgins Clark
Before I Say Goodbye – Mary Higgins Clark
Mount Vernon Love Story – Mary Higgins Clark
Yada Yada Prayer Group (Re-read my old ones and catch up on the new ones)
Mitford Series – Jan Karon
Step On A Crack – James Patterson
Judge & Jury – James Patterson
Little Women
The Secret
Twilight Series
Harry Potter Series
The Adventures of Hucklberry Finn
The Catcher in the Rye
The Good Earth
The Sound and the Fury

Health Goals:
Teeth cleaned!
Cavities filled
Eat more fruits & vegetables
Drink 8 glasses of water a day
Exercise at least 30 minutes everyday
Lose 10 lbs
Lose 20 lbs
Lose 30 lbs
Lose 40 lbs
Lose 50 lbs
Lose 60 lbs
Lose 70 lbs
Lose 80 lbs
Lose 100 lbs

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Lead By Example

I can't say that I am always the best example but I strive to be that way. During the school year most of the time Baylee eats lunch at school. On the rare occasion I pack her lunch I might slip in a note. It has probably been a year since I have done that. Well today Brian needed me to run home at lunch. He asked Baylee to fix me a sandwich to grab and take with me. Halfway back to work I took my sandwich out of the bag...pulled back the napkin it was so sweetly and carefully wrapped in and found this...

Sure makes a momma's heart proud. My little sweet girl!! :-)

The Root

Someone at work shared this with me today. I really needed it. I have been dealing with an issue that has been tough but I have really tried to let go and give it to God! One of the issues I have been dealing with was me being me. It saddens me to think there are those out there who can't take being nice and being yourself for what it is. I am not perfect. I have my faults. However, when I do something or desire a relationship with someone it is purely because of the love in my heart. I do things and say things because of my desire to care and love for others. It makes me sad that there are those out there that can't accept that. At first I was mad and was thinking well fine if they don't want to have anything to do with me and if all my decisions are the "wrong" ones then forget it. I just won't do this or that anymore. The truth is...that isn't me. I ENJOY being with other people and I ENJOY doing for others...even if there is nothing in return because I expect nothing in return. That being said...I am going to keep being ME...albeit a little more guarded version of ME but you can't change me. I want the fruit I bear to be the fruit that shows only one motivation...the motivation of love.

A farmer once planted two fruit trees on opposite sides of his property. One he planted to provide a hedge to hide the unsightly view of an old landfill; the other to provide shade to rest under near a cool mountain stream which ran down beside his fields. As the two trees grew, both produced and began to flower and bear fruit.

One day the farmer decided to gather the fruit from the tree nearest his house " the one used to provide a hedge from the landfill. As he brought the fruit inside the house, he noticed that it was a little deformed " the symmetry of the fruit was not very good, but still the fruit looked edible. Later that evening, while sitting on his porch the farmer took one of the pieces of fruit for a snack. Biting into the fruit, he found it to be extremely bitter, and completely inedible. Casting the fruit aside he looked across the field to the other tree over by the mountain stream.

After walking across the field, the farmer took a piece of the fruit from the other tree and bit into it. Find the fruit to be sweet and delicious he gathered several more pieces of fruit and took them to the house.

The fruit was greatly affected by the nutrition of the root. Just as the tree grew by the landfill to be bitter, and the tree by the stream produced sweet fruit, so the Christian has a choice. He can either put down his roots into the soil of the landfill of fleshly pursuits, or into the cool refreshing stream of the person of Jesus Christ. We must understand that the root bears the fruit. The fruit of the Christian is the outward evidence of the inward motivation.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Crazy, Crazy, Times!!

I am sitting at work on pins and needles. Brian is taking his EMT exam as I type this. We don't know if he will know the results instantly or if we will have to wait or not. He rarely gets nervous but this morning he was SO nervous. He is very ready to work on an ambulance. He loves to help people and he is very good at it. I am so proud of his accomplishments and so proud of him. We have been married 9 years this of this month we have been a couple for 10 years. He has always been an awesome guy but the past several years he has really evolved into a man that I know I will always and forever love. He really is my soul mate. I thank God for him. As much as he says I have helped him...he too has helped me. We really do bring out the best in each other. Mushy gushy...I know, I know. :-)

He and I have been taking A&PI this summer and he takes his final tomorrow and I take my next Tuesday. I am SOOO nervous. I am coming up with every study tactic I can find. I wish I could just lay my head down on my book and "soak" up all the useful information. It just seems like as I have gotten older I can't absorb as much as I used to. I also think I really do have adult ADD. What were we talking about again???

We have been dealing with some family issues lately. I have just hated seeing my husband so sad and hurt. I too have hurt but I have tried all I can do. I just wish it was easier for everyone to get along. The bad thing is that we WANT to be closer but we just keep being pushed back. So sad. :-( There is one family member I talked to this morning that I think being the mom of a boy that is closer to Brian's age understands more. She doesn't even know what has been going on (that I know of) and you know I always just feel good when I talk to her. She has a lot going on in her life right now with her own little family and I am remembering to say prayers for her everyday!

Hmmmm....what else, what else...oh Brian will be leaving to go out of town for 2 1/2 weeks for the USCG. He will come home for a week and then be gone for another whole week! Whoa is of a military wife! :-) I do plan to go down and visit him and get some beach time in during the next couple of weeks. We will see how that goes...


Monday, July 13, 2009

The Desires of My Heart

A friend of mine repeated something in her blog that the preacher told them this weekend at revival. It was:
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. I
realized tonight that I had let the desires of my heart keep me from delighting
myself in the Lord."
Have you ever read something or heard someone say something and think, "Wow, that could have just as easily come out of my mouth!" I would consider myself a good Christian. We have slacked off on our Church going a little because we are in Church limbo. We love the "family" church we are members of and are having a hard time saying goodbye. There is a church closer to home that we really love but it is like we are scared to dedicate because it almost feels like we are "cheating" on our Church family. Our response to this has not been a good thing. It has been that we have slacked off on going to Church all together. This is NOT the answer and I know it. We are just going to have to make the tough matter what we decide.

In saying that, I have also let other "desires of my heart" get in the way of my love of God. I have a lot of things going on in my life right now. I can't really go into a lot of detail (nothing bad just STUFF..LOL) but reading this quote on my friend's blog has put me in the mindset that I need to be in.

Put HIM first and all other things will fall into place!

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Summer Camp = Sad Mom!!

We drove Baylee to a week long, Operation Purple, summer camp last Sunday. I was so sad to leave her and I am SOOOO ready to go pick her up. I know she is having fun but I just miss that I can't talk to her everyday. I have sent several cards to her this week but it is not the same as hearing her voice. Brian has harassed me all week about the fact that I will be one of "those" moms when she goes off to college. At which point I promptly reminded him that we would not have to worry about it because she can will be living with us until she gets married (if I let her leave then!). I know, I know...wishful thinking on my part but let me live in my fantasy world until it happens, will ya? *grin* This morning when I was getting dressed I was thinking about several things.

First, new moms always think that their baby is the best baby...Lord knows I thought that (& still do sometimes!). It made me it fair for me to feel this way? Of course, most people choose their children as "the best" but if you really think about it EVERYONE is SOMEONES baby. Imagine how much easier life would be if people would realize this small fact of life. I think if we all thought of each other (and each other's children) as "someones baby" it makes them seem more human. More lovable. Hmmm...random thoughts I know.

The second thing I thought about is no matter how old your "babies" get they will always be your babies. I was lying in bed last night and having trouble sleeping thinking about all the things moms think about. (Is Baylee having fun, is she safe, is she happy, did she brush her teeth?) After about a half-hour of lying there my thoughts drifted to the day Baylee was born. It was the perfect delivery. She was born April 6, 1998, 4:32 p.m., 6lbs 8oz, 21 inches of pure beauty. Perfect in every way. She slept good, ate good and all together was a good baby. I think before I even had her I had pretty good mother instincts but it seems the second she was born they kicked in full blast. I could not sleep while at the hospital until I knew she was safely beside me. For the first two months of her life I would lie awake and watch her sleep. For the past 11 years I get up countless times and run in her room just to lay my hand on her chest to make sure she is okay. On many of those nights I lay down beside her and think about her life and hope everyday that she knows how much her daddy and I love her.

She is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to us. Brian and I like to say she is the best accomplishment we have ever made...raising a beautiful, smart, funny and sweet daughter. Sadly, we experienced a loss in June. What we would have hoped to be a baby brother or baby sister to our already perfect family. It was not God's timing. I grieved in my own time and now I am ready to move on. We do hope to give Baylee a sibling but sibling or no sibling...she is perfect to me.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

The Faith of Rick Warren

I think that Rick Warren is just an amazing man. The insight he has on our Heavenly Father is something I long for. I know it is easily found through life's rule book, The Bible, though I think true learning is a gift only given to some so that those of us (me!) that don't get it on our own can have complete understand of what our most awesome Heavenly Father has in store for us. I read this in an email this week and I have to say I was very much impressed with Rick Warren's response to his life's circumstances. I for one think he is an amazing man and from this day forth I will remember to PRAISE God for the good and the bad because without the bad I cannot be a witness to those that are going through the same problems I had/have/will have. The difference is there are those who go through these problems WITHOUT God in their lives and it is our duty as Christian to be the example that God expects us to be so that we may get a greater treasure than ANY treasure you could receive here on earth!!

In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:

People ask me, What is the purpose of life?

And I respond:

In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were not made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven. One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body-- but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity..

We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going
to make sense. Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now,
you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one.
The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than
your comfort; God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in
making your life happy. We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but
that's not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ
likeness. This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also
the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer. I used to think that
life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the
mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore. Rather than
life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a
railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in
your life. No matter how good things are in your life, there is always
something bad that needs to be worked on. And no matter how bad things
are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for.

You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems: If you focus
on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, which is my problem, my
issues, my pain.' But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your
focus off yourself and onto God and others. We discovered quickly that in
spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to
heal Kay or make it easy for her- It has been very difficult for her, and yet
God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other
people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people. You
have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life. Actually,
sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past
year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me
instantly very wealthy. It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had
never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety
for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease. So I began to ask God what
He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two
different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm
72. First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our
lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases. Second, about midway
through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church. Third, we
set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant
churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the
next generation. Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in
the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was
liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity? Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)? When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know
You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do
list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do. That's why we're
called human beings, not human doings.