Life Change!

I'm back for the 100th time! This time I am here with WONDERFUL news!! This coming Wednesday, December 16th, 2009, will be my last day as a paralegal! I am very blessed to now become a full-time mom, military wife and...*drum roll*...college student! Yes, that is right I will begin college again (at the age of 30!!) in the spring. I will be full-time and I am oh so excited. I will be applying for nursing school in the fall so please stick around for my journey!

The hubby is getting ready to deploy withing the next year or so (again). I am one of his units ombudsmen so I am very excited about having more time to spend with him and more to help the other families...especially those that may be experiencing this for the first time.

I am also very excited to be able to do more things as a wife and mom. This is my FAVORITE part of this life change and a part of my life that has been neglected far too long.

Another thing that I think I am going to try is to Vlog occasionally. (Video blogging) We will see how that goes! :)

Hope you have a great day!

Life List Update

Well this "updating" sure is going slow. Though, I guess a life list keeps growing most of the time!

Just an update:

Places To Visit:
Wyoming
Colorado
New York
California
Vegas!
Grand Canyon
Canada
Alaska
Hawaii
London
Venice Italy
Rome Italy
Madrid Spain
Tahiti
Jamaica
Bahamas
Cancun
Cozumel
Key West
Pennsylvania - Hershey Park & Historical Sites
Bora Bora

Things I Would Like To Do or Learn In My Lifetime:
Play the Piano
Play the Guitar
Fly A Plane
Go on A Cruise
Rock Climbing
Hike Up A Mountain
Snow Ski
Speak Spanish
Learn Sign Language
Swim with Dolphins
Fly in A Helicopter
Fly in A Hot Air Balloon
Finish Nursing School
Get some sort of degree (if not in nursing)
Start A Business
Write a Book
Go to the Oprah Show!
Ride Horseback on the beach!
Pay off 4-Wheeler!
Sell Brian's Truck!
Pay off Tahoe!
Pay off old Credit Card Bills!

Around The House
Organize my closets
Clip & Organize articles out of my old magazines and toss magazines!
Paint my bedroom
Paint my kitchen
Paint my living area
Organize all of my pictures
Scan all pictures in and put the on CD's
Get backyard fenced!
Organize & paint laundry room
Organize all cabinets – bathroom & kitchen
Organize Baylee's room….again!!

Books to Read or Read Again (In 2009):
Dear John – Nicholas Sparks
At First Sight – Nicholas Sparks
Three Weeks With My Brother – Nicholas Sparks
True Believer – Nicholas Sparks
The Wedding - Nicholas Sparks
Predator – Patricia Cornwell
Trace – Patricia Cornwell
I Heard That Song Before – Mary Higgins Clark
No Place Like Home – Mary Higgins Clark
Ghost Ship – Mary Higgins Clark
Before I Say Goodbye – Mary Higgins Clark
Mount Vernon Love Story – Mary Higgins Clark
Yada Yada Prayer Group (Re-read my old ones and catch up on the new ones)
Mitford Series – Jan Karon
Step On A Crack – James Patterson
Judge & Jury – James Patterson
Little Women
The Secret
Twilight Series
Harry Potter Series
The Adventures of Hucklberry Finn
Beloved
The Catcher in the Rye
The Good Earth
The Sound and the Fury

Health Goals:
Teeth cleaned!
Cavities filled
Eat more fruits & vegetables
Drink 8 glasses of water a day
Exercise at least 30 minutes everyday
Lose 10 lbs
Lose 20 lbs
Lose 30 lbs
Lose 40 lbs
Lose 50 lbs
Lose 60 lbs
Lose 70 lbs
Lose 80 lbs
Lose 100 lbs

Jingle, Jangle, Smack, Clip, Clip...

I SERIOUSLY have a problem with noises. (I blame this COMPLETELY on my mother - she knows it!) I work in what one would call a glorified cubicle. True it does have walls...but they don't go all the way to the ceiling. As you can see from this picture - there is about 3 feet from the top of my wall to the ceiling. (To the right you can see my door and in the middle is the picture above my bookcase.)

Well I tell you that you can HEAR EVERYTHING in my office. Jingling of peoples bracelets, smacking, typing, etc. One thing that has driving me NUTS these past few months is the sweet old man in the office right beside me. I believe he is in his last 70's and he constantly talks on speaker phone. (Crazy, right?) Well he just isn't used to being in our "glorified cubicles". His office (and several others) had mold in them and he is working in the empty one next to mine until his office is finished. As if speaker phone (and other noises of the office!) weren't bad enough what really gets me is "clip, clip" "Clip, clip clip" "CLIP CLIP CLIP"...can you guess? Clip clip is the sound of fingernail clipping. Can we say gag? Every time I hear it all I can pictures is this sweet little man in their clipping his old man fingernails and little bits flying everywhere! Man his nails must grow fast b/c he does this all the time! LOL...well at least it isn't his toenails...I HOPE!

Here We Go Again...

I had a dream about getting a positive pregnancy test last night. When I woke up this morning I thought what the heck...and I took a test. Instantly, I saw only 1 line. I went and did a few things for Baylee and got her going for the day. I came back and I saw the faintest of a 2nd line. I mean FAINT as in my mom would probably have to put on her readers to see it. It was definitely there though. If you have read my blog you will know that we have tried for years to have another baby. Then in June I found out I was pregnant and then had a miscarriage. I was only around 5 weeks. Either way, it was still very sad. Not a lot of people knew but it hurt just the same. It was very hard to tell my husband. I have decided this time instead of saying ANYTHING I am going to wait a few more days - probably until Sunday - and test again. Who knows, maybe the "faint" line is an evaporation line or just a fluke. I just can't go through all the heartache again. So I am going to pray it is for real BUT I will really try hard to not get my hopes up. I kind of feel bad writing this here but I have to get it off my chest. Plus, anyone reading this that knows my husband knows he is more of "tell me when you know for sure" type person. (Especially after the m/c.).

**UPDATE** It was negative when I retested. :(

MISSISSIPPI...YOU ARE FAT!!!

Well Mississippi was in the news again. Come on Mississippi what are we doing here? I mean I KNOW we like to eat. Lord knows momma can cook better than any resturaunt you step foot in but do we REALLY want to have this weighing on our shoulders. I have decided this week I am NOT going to be a statistic anymore. I am working really hard to eat better. Life is too short! I will be 30 next month and I want to enjoy my 30's and not be miserable the whole time.

I hereby dedicate myself to at least 30 minutes of exercise daily!!

Come on Mississippi...Let's Go Walking!!!!

Life List

Just an update:

Places To Visit:
Wyoming
Colorado
New York
California
Vegas!
Grand Canyon
Canada
Alaska
Hawaii
London
Venice Italy
Rome Italy
Madrid Spain
Tahiti
Jamaica
Bahamas
Cancun
Cozumel
Key West
Pennsylvania - Hershey Park & Historical Sites
Bora Bora

Things I Would Like To Do or Learn In My Lifetime:
Play the Piano
Play the Guitar
Fly A Plane
Go on A Cruise
Rock Climbing
Hike Up A Mountain
Snow Ski
Speak Spanish
Learn Sign Language
Swim with Dolphins
Fly in A Helicopter
Fly in A Hot Air Balloon
Finish Nursing School
Get some sort of degree (if not in nursing)
Start A Business
Write a Book
Go to the Oprah Show!
Ride Horseback on the beach!
Pay off 4-Wheeler!
Sell Brian's Truck!
Pay off Tahoe!
Pay off old Credit Card Bills!

Around The House
Organize my closets
Clip & Organize articles out of my old magazines and toss magazines!
Paint my bedroom
Paint my kitchen
Paint my living area
Organize all of my pictures
Scan all pictures in and put the on CD's
Get backyard fenced!
Organize & paint laundry room
Organize all cabinets – bathroom & kitchen
Organize Baylee's room….again!!

Books to Read or Read Again (In 2009):
Dear John – Nicholas Sparks
At First Sight – Nicholas Sparks
Three Weeks With My Brother – Nicholas Sparks
True Believer – Nicholas Sparks
The Wedding - Nicholas Sparks
Predator – Patricia Cornwell
Trace – Patricia Cornwell
I Heard That Song Before – Mary Higgins Clark
No Place Like Home – Mary Higgins Clark
Ghost Ship – Mary Higgins Clark
Before I Say Goodbye – Mary Higgins Clark
Mount Vernon Love Story – Mary Higgins Clark
Yada Yada Prayer Group (Re-read my old ones and catch up on the new ones)
Mitford Series – Jan Karon
Step On A Crack – James Patterson
Judge & Jury – James Patterson
Little Women
The Secret
Twilight Series
Harry Potter Series
The Adventures of Hucklberry Finn
Beloved
The Catcher in the Rye
The Good Earth
The Sound and the Fury

Health Goals:
Teeth cleaned!
Cavities filled
Eat more fruits & vegetables
Drink 8 glasses of water a day
Exercise at least 30 minutes everyday
Lose 10 lbs
Lose 20 lbs
Lose 30 lbs
Lose 40 lbs
Lose 50 lbs
Lose 60 lbs
Lose 70 lbs
Lose 80 lbs
Lose 100 lbs

Lead By Example

I can't say that I am always the best example but I strive to be that way. During the school year most of the time Baylee eats lunch at school. On the rare occasion I pack her lunch I might slip in a note. It has probably been a year since I have done that. Well today Brian needed me to run home at lunch. He asked Baylee to fix me a sandwich to grab and take with me. Halfway back to work I took my sandwich out of the bag...pulled back the napkin it was so sweetly and carefully wrapped in and found this...

Sure makes a momma's heart proud. My little sweet girl!! :-)

The Root

Someone at work shared this with me today. I really needed it. I have been dealing with an issue that has been tough but I have really tried to let go and give it to God! One of the issues I have been dealing with was me being me. It saddens me to think there are those out there who can't take being nice and being yourself for what it is. I am not perfect. I have my faults. However, when I do something or desire a relationship with someone it is purely because of the love in my heart. I do things and say things because of my desire to care and love for others. It makes me sad that there are those out there that can't accept that. At first I was mad and was thinking well fine if they don't want to have anything to do with me and if all my decisions are the "wrong" ones then forget it. I just won't do this or that anymore. The truth is...that isn't me. I ENJOY being with other people and I ENJOY doing for others...even if there is nothing in return because I expect nothing in return. That being said...I am going to keep being ME...albeit a little more guarded version of ME but you can't change me. I want the fruit I bear to be the fruit that shows only one motivation...the motivation of love.


A farmer once planted two fruit trees on opposite sides of his property. One he planted to provide a hedge to hide the unsightly view of an old landfill; the other to provide shade to rest under near a cool mountain stream which ran down beside his fields. As the two trees grew, both produced and began to flower and bear fruit.

One day the farmer decided to gather the fruit from the tree nearest his house " the one used to provide a hedge from the landfill. As he brought the fruit inside the house, he noticed that it was a little deformed " the symmetry of the fruit was not very good, but still the fruit looked edible. Later that evening, while sitting on his porch the farmer took one of the pieces of fruit for a snack. Biting into the fruit, he found it to be extremely bitter, and completely inedible. Casting the fruit aside he looked across the field to the other tree over by the mountain stream.

After walking across the field, the farmer took a piece of the fruit from the other tree and bit into it. Find the fruit to be sweet and delicious he gathered several more pieces of fruit and took them to the house.

The fruit was greatly affected by the nutrition of the root. Just as the tree grew by the landfill to be bitter, and the tree by the stream produced sweet fruit, so the Christian has a choice. He can either put down his roots into the soil of the landfill of fleshly pursuits, or into the cool refreshing stream of the person of Jesus Christ. We must understand that the root bears the fruit. The fruit of the Christian is the outward evidence of the inward motivation.

Crazy, Crazy, Times!!

I am sitting at work on pins and needles. Brian is taking his EMT exam as I type this. We don't know if he will know the results instantly or if we will have to wait or not. He rarely gets nervous but this morning he was SO nervous. He is very ready to work on an ambulance. He loves to help people and he is very good at it. I am so proud of his accomplishments and so proud of him. We have been married 9 years this year...as of this month we have been a couple for 10 years. He has always been an awesome guy but the past several years he has really evolved into a man that I know I will always and forever love. He really is my soul mate. I thank God for him. As much as he says I have helped him...he too has helped me. We really do bring out the best in each other. Mushy gushy...I know, I know. :-)

He and I have been taking A&PI this summer and he takes his final tomorrow and I take my next Tuesday. I am SOOO nervous. I am coming up with every study tactic I can find. I wish I could just lay my head down on my book and "soak" up all the useful information. It just seems like as I have gotten older I can't absorb as much as I used to. I also think I really do have adult ADD. What were we talking about again???

We have been dealing with some family issues lately. I have just hated seeing my husband so sad and hurt. I too have hurt but I have tried all I can do. I just wish it was easier for everyone to get along. The bad thing is that we WANT to be closer but we just keep being pushed back. So sad. :-( There is one family member I talked to this morning that I think being the mom of a boy that is closer to Brian's age understands more. She doesn't even know what has been going on (that I know of) and you know I always just feel good when I talk to her. She has a lot going on in her life right now with her own little family and I am remembering to say prayers for her everyday!

Hmmmm....what else, what else...oh Brian will be leaving to go out of town for 2 1/2 weeks for the USCG. He will come home for a week and then be gone for another whole week! Whoa is me...life of a military wife! :-) I do plan to go down and visit him and get some beach time in during the next couple of weeks. We will see how that goes...

Later!!

The Desires of My Heart

A friend of mine repeated something in her blog that the preacher told them this weekend at revival. It was:

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. I
realized tonight that I had let the desires of my heart keep me from delighting
myself in the Lord."

Have you ever read something or heard someone say something and think, "Wow, that could have just as easily come out of my mouth!" I would consider myself a good Christian. We have slacked off on our Church going a little because we are in Church limbo. We love the "family" church we are members of and are having a hard time saying goodbye. There is a church closer to home that we really love but it is like we are scared to dedicate because it almost feels like we are "cheating" on our Church family. Our response to this has not been a good thing. It has been that we have slacked off on going to Church all together. This is NOT the answer and I know it. We are just going to have to make the tough decision...no matter what we decide.

In saying that, I have also let other "desires of my heart" get in the way of my love of God. I have a lot of things going on in my life right now. I can't really go into a lot of detail (nothing bad just STUFF..LOL) but reading this quote on my friend's blog has put me in the mindset that I need to be in.

Put HIM first and all other things will fall into place!

Summer Camp = Sad Mom!!

We drove Baylee to a week long, Operation Purple, summer camp last Sunday. I was so sad to leave her and I am SOOOO ready to go pick her up. I know she is having fun but I just miss that I can't talk to her everyday. I have sent several cards to her this week but it is not the same as hearing her voice. Brian has harassed me all week about the fact that I will be one of "those" moms when she goes off to college. At which point I promptly reminded him that we would not have to worry about it because she can will be living with us until she gets married (if I let her leave then!). I know, I know...wishful thinking on my part but let me live in my fantasy world until it happens, will ya? *grin* This morning when I was getting dressed I was thinking about several things.

First, new moms always think that their baby is the best baby...Lord knows I thought that (& still do sometimes!). It made me think...is it fair for me to feel this way? Of course, most people choose their children as "the best" but if you really think about it EVERYONE is SOMEONES baby. Imagine how much easier life would be if people would realize this small fact of life. I think if we all thought of each other (and each other's children) as "someones baby" it makes them seem more human. More lovable. Hmmm...random thoughts I know.

The second thing I thought about is no matter how old your "babies" get they will always be your babies. I was lying in bed last night and having trouble sleeping thinking about all the things moms think about. (Is Baylee having fun, is she safe, is she happy, did she brush her teeth?) After about a half-hour of lying there my thoughts drifted to the day Baylee was born. It was the perfect delivery. She was born April 6, 1998, 4:32 p.m., 6lbs 8oz, 21 inches of pure beauty. Perfect in every way. She slept good, ate good and all together was a good baby. I think before I even had her I had pretty good mother instincts but it seems the second she was born they kicked in full blast. I could not sleep while at the hospital until I knew she was safely beside me. For the first two months of her life I would lie awake and watch her sleep. For the past 11 years I get up countless times and run in her room just to lay my hand on her chest to make sure she is okay. On many of those nights I lay down beside her and think about her life and hope everyday that she knows how much her daddy and I love her.

She is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to us. Brian and I like to say she is the best accomplishment we have ever made...raising a beautiful, smart, funny and sweet daughter. Sadly, we experienced a loss in June. What we would have hoped to be a baby brother or baby sister to our already perfect family. It was not God's timing. I grieved in my own time and now I am ready to move on. We do hope to give Baylee a sibling but sibling or no sibling...she is perfect to me.

The Faith of Rick Warren

I think that Rick Warren is just an amazing man. The insight he has on our Heavenly Father is something I long for. I know it is easily found through life's rule book, The Bible, though I think true learning is a gift only given to some so that those of us (me!) that don't get it on our own can have complete understand of what our most awesome Heavenly Father has in store for us. I read this in an email this week and I have to say I was very much impressed with Rick Warren's response to his life's circumstances. I for one think he is an amazing man and from this day forth I will remember to PRAISE God for the good and the bad because without the bad I cannot be a witness to those that are going through the same problems I had/have/will have. The difference is there are those who go through these problems WITHOUT God in their lives and it is our duty as Christian to be the example that God expects us to be so that we may get a greater treasure than ANY treasure you could receive here on earth!!

In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:

People ask me, What is the purpose of life?

And I respond:

In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were not made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven. One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body-- but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity..

We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going
to make sense. Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now,
you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one.
The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than
your comfort; God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in
making your life happy. We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but
that's not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ
likeness. This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also
the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer. I used to think that
life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the
mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore. Rather than
life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a
railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in
your life. No matter how good things are in your life, there is always
something bad that needs to be worked on. And no matter how bad things
are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for.

You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems: If you focus
on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, which is my problem, my
issues, my pain.' But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your
focus off yourself and onto God and others. We discovered quickly that in
spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to
heal Kay or make it easy for her- It has been very difficult for her, and yet
God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other
people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people. You
have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life. Actually,
sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past
year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me
instantly very wealthy. It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had
never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety
for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease. So I began to ask God what
He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two
different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm
72. First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our
lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases. Second, about midway
through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church. Third, we
set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant
churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the
next generation. Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in
the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was
liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity? Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)? When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know
You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do
list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do. That's why we're
called human beings, not human doings.

The Ups & Downs!!

Last week was definitely a roller coaster ride. I had lots of positives and then lots of negatives. I am glad that is over FOR SURE. I suffered a few different types of "loss" last week that at the moment I don't care to share with the wide world web but in due time I may decide to. One thing I did learn last week is I am really getting good at rolling with the punches. I don't really know if that is a good thing or not. I just feel like sometimes the world just throws so many at us that we have a tendency to want to fight back. I have to go back to my faith in God and learn in some instances to turn the other cheek. In other instances I am learning loss no matter how little it seems DOES hurt and it IS okay to grieve over it. I have learned that when God is ready for us to have another baby it will happen in HIS time not mine. He is the all powerful and all knowing and I need to remember that even when something is so close that it is sitting in your hand if God chooses to take it back it is because he is trying to teach me something that I don't understand at the time. After all this life is NOT mine it is his. It is his to live how he wants me to live and my body is HIS temple. This week I am working on better ME for HIM. Not for my own worldly needs or wants or for anyone else. In Christ Alone...

Motivate Me Monday: Getting Right In Hard Times

I actually received this in an email from someone I know last year so I can't claim it as my own but in this crazy world I often go back and refer to it. It reminds me that things are like they were. I am not one to walk around and say "these are the end times" but how do we really know? I think it is very similar to when bad weather is coming you get prepared...so in saying that we need to prepare ourselves because we don't know when the end is coming.

Dear Ones,

On June 27th and 28th 2008 I attended a conference in Atlanta called Deeper Still. Internationally known speakers Kay Arthur, Beth Moore and Priscilla Shirer were there and I looked forward to a special time of worship and having God convict me of my sins and lead me to areas in my life where I need to change. I have been to similar conferences for years, although none this large and with so many well-known speakers. There were over 20,000 women in attendance at the Phillips Arena in Atlanta - they said it was the largest crowd ever. I had an idea of what to expect from the conference, but nothing prepared me for what actually happened. I feel led to share my experience with family and friends. This is important, so stay with me!

When Kay Arthur took the stage you could just tell that her spirit was heavy and there was a certain "heaviness" in the atmosphere even before she started to speak. She said that she had been literally physically sick to have to bring us this message and right out the gate she said, "We are in grave danger." She said that God had revealed to her that a literal famine is coming to America. Physical, not spiritual. She said that God is moving in judgment against our nation. I know I can't describe this well enough, but the atmosphere was ominous.

Kay is a seasoned speaker and she had to BATTLE to get through her message. She stumbled over scriptures and had an extremely difficult time. At times I was almost expecting her to collapse. At one point she just had to stop and pray. There was no person, myself included, that I could see who did not have tears streaming down their faces. As you may know, Kay Arthur is normally a very confident, composed speaker, but she was literally in a spiritual battle and it was taking place right before my eyes. I have never seen anything like it.

She went on to give 7 things that Christians must do during this time and I am going to give those to you now:

1. Jer 4:3- Break up the fallow ground- return to Me. Repent. Get on your face before God and ask him to break your heart with the things that break His heart.

2. Mourn- Jer. 9:17-18 and Ezekiel 9. It is time to weep because our nation's sin is incredible.

3. Pray- Jer 36:7- Pray fervently, passionately for America.

4. Love God's Word- Jer. 20. You MUST love the Word of God and be in the Word of God. I was particularly convicted here because I know I have not been as deeply in His Word as I need to be. She said we must get serious about this.

5. Love others as Jesus loved them. Jer. 31:3 and John 13:34.

6. Introduce people to Jesus Christ. It's time to get serious about this. This is no time for timidity. Jer 31:31; Jer 33:1-9 and 15 and 17.

7. Rest. If you will do these things, then rest in the fact that you have done God's will. She said that it is going to be vitally important for us to get enough physical rest.

She went on to say that God has not given us a spirit of fear and that if we are obedient to Him, we will be protected. She said to read Ezekiel 14 over and over until you understand it. This is what God will do if a country turns against Him.

She said that this is going to be a calamity (she used the word calamity in such a way that you knew this is going to be no small thing for our country), and gave many more scripture references, but what I have given you are the main points that she made.

I hope you know that I would not have sent this to you if I had not been profoundly affected by it and feel it is of great importance to share it. Thank you for taking the time to re ad this and I hope you will do with this information what you feel led by God to do.

OuT oF sHaPe...

Let me tell ya'll a (scary) true story. So Brian has a bike and Baylee does. Well the other day they are all like PPPUUUHHHLLLLEEEAAASSSSEEEE come ride with us. Baylee said you can even ride my bike b/c the seat is softer. I was like no no no no and then finally I was like FINE. UGH. I took my hand out of the powdered donut bag, licked my fingers, gulped down my WHOLE milk and put on my tennis shoes. Fine. Want. Me. To. Exercise. With. You. Fine. Hmm....I will show you.

So we start off good...seat a little uncomfortable (which is odd seeing how much padding I really DO have back there) but I go for it...pulling out of the driveway on two-wheels like the road queen....turned the corner and took off the back street behind my house..was doing good...patting myself on the back. I am awesome...this is not a problem. So then we approach the hill. I decide to get tricky and I stand up on the bike and start pedaling as fast as I could so I could make it up the hill. Got about ¾ of the way up and had to get off and walk. I was fine but just couldn't go any further. So I tell them (Brian running and Baylee on the other bike) go on I will catch up. Just give me a second. So I keep walking the bike. Well the further they got away from me and then out of my site the more I couldn't breathe.

...wwwwhhhheeeezzzzeeee....wwwwhhhhheeeeeezzzeeee...chest hurts can't hardly move but I know I am getting ready to go down a hill and I am like...okay...I got this. I make it to the top of the hill and jump on and WEEEEEEEEEEEE......all the way down to the bottom. I let the bike coast until I almost stop and then I have to jump back off. THEN I have to walk the bike the rest of the way. I made it the whole mile and ½ but couldn't hang on the bike the whole way. What is sad is they made it all the way back home and then WALKED and met me about 1/2 mile before I got to the house. Geesshh...talk about out of shape. Now I understand why people on the biggest loser literally get sick from working so hard sometimes...I sure almost did. Seriously. I mean I gotta do something about ALLL of this b/c I will die of a heart attack!!

WFMW: Soft Feet & Fixing Squeaks!

I have been a blog slacker this past week so I thought what better way to get back in the swing of things that participating in WFMW!! I actually have two for one this week considering I could not think of a THING last week! So here you go!!!

Soft Feet

I actually learned this one from my mom. When you don't have time to give yourself a good pedicure and/or go get one....you can rub Vaseline real good on your dry heals and put on a pair of socks and wear them while you are getting ready (and even in the car if you can) and right before you get to your "sandal/flip-flop" wearing event you take them off and your feet look good enough to last you for the whole day. I took this one step further. With the weather changing back and forth one day we wear flip-flops the next we wear socks/shoes. SO...I rub Vaseline on my heals and put on a pair of socks before bed.

Fixing Squeaks!

If you are like me you probalby can never find where your husband left the WD40. Well while my husband was deployed I was having trouble with the lock/key in the front door and of course I had NO idea where the WD40 was. I had a "light bulb" idea and decided to use cooking spray and *baam* worked like a charm. Since then anytime I have a squeaky door that needs a quick fix I pull out the cooking spray!

Motivate Me Monday: The Prayer Garden

Well folks...I must say this is one of my days of blah. As you see from my previous post I haven't been feeling well and the weather here has been a little gloomy. They say it is supposed to but sunny tomorrow...I hope so!! So in saying that - I am not much on motivation today for others but do look forward to going around and reading your blogs. I am leaving a LITTLE something for you. I really enjoy this "Prayer Garden"...if you have never seen it please see it now!! It is awesome. Better to do it when you are alone and/or can take time to enjoy it.

(The Lightening bug stops and is a little hard to see, but watch where he lights and click on him. You must click on the bug before you can move the key)
This is Awesome and Very well done.
View when you have a little time to spare so you can really enjoy it.
Start with the lightening bug it will be your guide through the garden...
Unlock the door with the key (drag the key to the lock),
When you enter the Garden, click on the littleLighting bug and follow instructions.

Keep clicking as you go to make changes and experience everything.
You will start at the fountain with the sontes.

When you are have looked at the stones.
Click on the lightening bug again and it will take you to the river and the sticks.
(Click on the lightening bug again.)
You will go to the table and the scrolls.
Click on the cup and then each scroll.
When you finish the scrolls click on the book.
Then on the lightening bug again.
Then on each leaf...
Then the fire...
Then the book on the stool...
Top Right is the Exit
THIS IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL

http://www.prayerforthenations.com/prayergarden/flash.htm

~DO RE MI FA SO LA TI DO~

I am very excited for my daughter! I will be honest and say that often times she doesn't have a great voice. I do think that it is more b/c of "trying to hard" and not "lack of talent". I PERSONALLY can't save to sing my life but she got that from her father's side of the family. I think with a little help she could get better. I know here music teacher all the way through elementary school loved her. We were excited that out of over 150 kids that tried out that she made it in the middle school choir. I don't think she will be a soloist anytime soon but I am just so proud of her and I know she will really enjoy it! Yeah Baylee!!!

..Gloomy Days...

It has been one of those weeks. This past weekend I had a baby shower for my sister-in-law, cooked out with friends and then visited with the in-laws. I really enjoyed it but boy did it get to me. I have been exhausted ever since. I missed work this week b/c of not feeling good and Baylee missed one day of school. Thank goodness I didn't get the flu like my mother-in-law did. Poor thing! Seems like she always catches something. If it weren't for being worried about bringing something home to Baylee and Brian I would go over and take care of her. It is the pits to feel bad and then be locked in the house all alone. :-( I am feeling better but I have been fighting a headache for the better part of a week and a half. That and dizziness. Couple that with not feeling good and being exhausted for some strange reason and you have one gloomy girl. The weather is gloomy today as well and they say it is going to be a 60% chance of rain tomorrow. Hooo-Huummm. Well at least it will good napping weather.

Bring on the spring days PLEASE!

WFMW: Fast Meal Tips

So ladies (& guys??) this is a quick and easy tip (and not originally my idea but can't remember where I got it from - if it is you please let me know so I can give proper credit!). Sorry I haven't put too much effort into it this week. I have been sick and my brain just isn't functioning like it should!!

My tip is pick things that your family may like that you can have on hand for several different meals. You can cook it and freeze it ahead of time so when you are in a crunch (or haven't made that dreaded trip to the grocery store), you always have something on hand.

For example, taco meat (browned, seasoned and frozen - just defrost and look at the possibilities:

1. Nacho Omelets for Breakfast
2. Meat for tator skins
3. Quesadillas
4. Put on biscuits and add cheese for a quick snack/lunch
5. Tortilla Pizza
6. Mexican Sloppy Joe
7. Add to melted block of Velveeta
8. Tortilla roll ups
9. Add to Chili
10. Add to Soup
11. Add to Meatloaf
12. Short on hamburger meat for burgers - add to that!
13. Add to a box of macaroni & cheese for a quick meal that kids love in a crunch!
14. Add w/spaghetti sauce
15. Out of shells but have lettuce...taco salad!

Just a few ideas of what to do in a pinch!

Motivate Me Monday: Let Us Use Them

Below is something that I received and read occasionally. It is from Hannah's Cupboard. (Which happens to be another place all of us ladies can go check out for "motivation") This is a lesson that I all too often forget.

There is not one person in the Body of Christ without some God given gift to share. For some reason, this is not a well known fact. Well, maybe in theory it is known but in practice it is not really believed by all.

I have a gift? Moi? No, not really, I don't have any gifts. End of story. It would be like an organ in our body saying; "I'm useless; I just sit here quietly and do my own thing and all the other organs work around me." Actually, when the body takes that attitude we call it "disease."

The Bible says this: "So we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them." (Romans 12:5-6)

So I say, are you using your gifts? Please use your gifts - they are so needed! If your gift is small it can become larger with use. You know that muscles expand with use; practicing a musical instrument brings improvement; working the garden yields growth. Un-used, your gift may seem puny, but in use, it will produce a huge harvest.

If you somehow feel inadequate or feel your gift is insignificant you are no different than everyone else before they launched into the work of the kingdom. Only Christ who is our head is perfectly adequate and magnificently significant. Yet he passed out gifts to all of us, every single one. Let us use them.

The reason that this inspires me is because my gift is not really one of motivating others. I can't quote verses out of the bible (but I can tell you I know it is in there somewhere), I can't tell you where you can find important events in the bible (but I can tell you they are in there!) BUT there are other things I can do!!!

1. I can continue to grow "in the word" by ready my bible....and reading "Motivateational Monday"
2. Pray, pray, pray!
3. Be a Christian example for others
4. Be a listening ear
5. Did I mention...prayer??? :-)

There are many more things I can do but these are the ones I am definitely going to strive for right now!

WFMW: Are We There Yet?

If you would like to participate in Works-For-Me Wednesday, please go here.

This weeks theme is "greatest hits". Well this is still one of my favorite tips for "on the road". This could work for a day of running errands or long road trips!

Some may already know of this but if you don't this is a great way to keep kids entertained on a long trip. I take zip lock bags and put not only snacks for the trip but small toys, games, books all in their own bags. The trick is to buy small "travel" type games and toys (I am talking C.H.E.A.P. - like from the Everything's A Dollar Store) and keep them in a bag up front with you and not let the kids see them "at all" until it is time to pass them out. Then everytime they start to get fussy you pull out something "new". I have even done this with toys out of my daughter's room that she didn't know I brought. The reason it works so well is because if you give them everything all at once they get "bored". If you give them things "they don't even know you have" spread out through the trip they will play longer with each toy instead of the usual, "Are we there yet?" after five minutes. I am sure this works with kids of all ages but it really worked very well when my daughter was younger and just she and I would make long trips to visit family, etc.

MMM: Word of Wisdom

This is my very first "Motivate Me Monday" post. I ran across this on someone's blog (can't recall who at the moment) and thought, "What a wonderful idea!!" So what inspires me...there are so many I could use but since this is my first post I will be short and sweet.

For my birthday last year a friend of mine gave me a set of "Words of Wisdom" cards that sit on my desk at work. (She bought them at Lifeway.) I try to look at them everyday and pick one and think, "How can I act on this?".

For example, today I read this one: "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow His precepts have good understanding. To Him belongs eternal praise." Psalm 111:10

I then think of how each do these "Words of Wisdom" can be used in my life!

Oh Baby, Baby

I had mentioned in a previous post our desire to add to our already wonderful family! Well it is official. Starting yesterday, March 1st, we are back on the TTC wagon. As I mentioned before we had been on the TTC wagon for a little while. Then we found out my sister-in-law was pregnant and out of respect for her first pregnancy decided to give her a little time AND get through the holidays before we tried again. We are going to try for 6 months and then take a break for awhile. There are several reasons behind that but that will have to be another post all together! So what are we doing different this go around you ask:

1. Taking Provera

2. Taking Origins for Women - for reproductive health

3. Will begin in April taking clomid

4. Basal bady temps

5. Charting

6. Diet & Exercise

If it is meant to be it will happen. If not we do understand it is God's will at this time. I will try to update at least once a month. :-)

WFMW: Travel Planner

If you want to participate or get other helpful hints please go here.

Well it has been so long since I have participated in WFMW that I thought I would join right in this week! (Even though I am a little late getting in the game!) So these aren't THAT great of tips but just some things I found that I thought would be fun to share. If any of you are like me you start planning your vacations at the first of each year. Well I have found two really neat places online to use in planning my trips:

1. Yahoo Travel - This is a good place to see other peoples pictures & itineraries to get ideas of things you might enjoy doing. You can map out your whole trip using Yahoo and even journal about your trip and add photos!
2. Travelocity Last Minute Packages - If you have never looked into these you really should! The have some great deals for some GREAT places!!

One other thing (yes I know this now makes 3 instead of 2!) is if you go to the Travelocity Last Minute Packages you can actually pick two separate departure cities. For instance, if you have a family member/friend that lives in another town/state you can actually both book at the same time to go and meet up at the same place!

Well that is my WFMW!

Life List

Here is my first draft of my "life" list. I actually did this back in 2007 but thought I would add it here. I am sure I will be adding more as time goes on but I really can't wait to strike through some of these things! It felt really good to get my goals down in writing!

Places To Visit:
Wyoming
Colorado
New York
California
Vegas!
Grand Canyon
Canada
Alaska
Hawaii
London
Venice Italy
Rome Italy
Madrid Spain
Tahiti
Jamaica
Bahamas
Cancun
Cozumel
Key West
Pennsylvania - Hershey Park & Historical Sites
Bora Bora

Things I Would Like To Do or Learn In My Lifetime:
Play the Piano
Play the Guitar
Fly A Plane
Go on A Cruise
Rock Climbing
Hike Up A Mountain
Snow Ski
Speak Spanish
Learn Sign Language
Swim with Dolphins
Fly in A Helicopter
Fly in A Hot Air Balloon
Finish Nursing School
Get some sort of degree (if not in nursing)
Start A Business
Write a Book
Go to the Oprah Show!
Ride Horseback on the beach!
Pay off 4-Wheeler!
Sell Brian's Truck!
Pay off Tahoe!
Pay off old Credit Card Bills!

Around The House
Organize my closets
Clip & Organize articles out of my old magazines and toss magazines!
Paint my bedroom
Paint my kitchen
Paint my living area
Organize all of my pictures
Scan all pictures in and put the on CD's
Get backyard fenced!
Organize & paint laundry room
Organize all cabinets – bathroom & kitchen
Organize Baylee's room….again!!

Books to Read or Read Again:
Dear John – Nicholas Sparks
At First Sight – Nicholas Sparks
Three Weeks With My Brother – Nicholas Sparks
True Believer – Nicholas Sparks
The Wedding - Nicholas Sparks
Predator – Patricia Cornwell
Trace – Patricia Cornwell
I Heard That Song Before – Mary Higgins Clark
No Place Like Home – Mary Higgins Clark
Ghost Ship – Mary Higgins Clark
Before I Say Goodbye – Mary Higgins Clark
Mount Vernon Love Story – Mary Higgins Clark
Yada Yada Prayer Group (Re-read my old ones and catch up on the new ones)
Mitford Series – Jan Karon
Step On A Crack – James Patterson
Judge & Jury – James Patterson
Little Women
The Secret

Health Goals:
Teeth cleaned!
Cavities filled
Eat more fruits & vegetables
Drink 8 glasses of water a day
Exercise at least 30 minutes everyday
Lose 10 lbs
Lose 20 lbs
Lose 30 lbs
Lose 40 lbs
Lose 50 lbs
Lose 60 lbs
Lose 70 lbs
Lose 80 lbs
Lose 100 lbs

Military Wives...This Is For You

For all of you who wake up in the morning, lay there for a few moments, trying to swallow the sick feeling in the pit of your stomach as you wonder where your man is, or how he's doing...this is for you.

For all of you who start a countdown the minute he leaves, and continue to until he is back in your arms again...this is for you.

For all of you who tear up everytime "Far Away" comes on the radio, or who press repeat when "Come Home Soon" plays in their car...this one's for you.

For all of you who see Military billboards, ads in the paper, or commercials on TV and next notice the tears rolling down your cheeks, this is for you.This is for you.

I am one of you too. This is for us.For all the times we sleep with our phones on the loudest possible volume, just as to not miss the call that just MIGHT come...For all the times we roll our eyes when another girl is depressed because she hasn't seen her guy in a week...For all the times we hear our guy's name mentioned out loud, and are momentarily frozen...in a trance...in love.For all the late nights that we spend alone, cuddling with our stuffed animals, wearing our guy's sweatshirts and sweatpants, and clutching the precious dog tags around our necks...This one's for us.We may feel weak on the inside, but on the outside we're strong.We may be drowning in tears on the inside, but on the outside, we are a rock.We may want to crawl in bed and sleep until our man comes home, but instead, we get up and go on with our daily lives with our men in our hearts.We may feel like we're slowly dying with each day we spend apart from our men, but instead, we put one foot infront of the other, and take each day as it comes.We are strong, and we are proud.We have more love in our hearts than we ever thought possible, and for this, we are thankful. We are thankful for our men and also for each other. We are Military gals, and we lean on each other.Alone we are weak, but together, we are strong. We help each other, and we survive.

To all you Military gals out there, hold your head up and be proud.We are connected, ALWAYS.

SlimQuick Cleanse: The Beginning

Well as you may have seen from previous post I am very ready to get healthy and lose some weight! I have slacked off for about 3 weeks now but time to get back on the wagon! A friend at work and myself are starting the SlimQuick Cleanse today. I will report back on how it works. I don't take the first dose until right before lunch. Thus far, I have had breakfast, taken my vitamin and had 2 glasses of water. For me having the 2 glasses of water is a HUGE step due to the fact most days I don't even drink water!!!

UPDATE: Prayer Request for Mom

UPDATE: My mom had her stress test yesterday. Thus far, no significant news. Just a scare or eye opener for us all. We are supposed to start next month taking a heart healthy class given by a nutritionist next month at St. Dominics. I am sure I will be back writing about that! Ha!!Thank you everyone for all of the prayers!!!

Sweet Little Heart...

...even though she was sarcastic at school. :-) I shared the bad so I thought I would share a good. I really think there should be a good balance! Ha! Brian and I were both out of town last weekend for Valentines day. Baylee stayed with her mamaw Sally. Mamaw Sally, my mom and myself all go to the same church. They had a Valentines dinner on Saturday night. While there my mom gave Baylee a Valetines card with $5.00 in it. The next morning at Church Baylee put part of her money in the offering plate and then gave part to my mom. She walked up to her and said, "Nana, I want you to send this to those little kids that don't have any food." See my mom (Nana) has a box at her house and everytime we go over Baylee puts extra change/cash in it. When my mom has a certain amount she sends it to the poor.

We have really tried to teach Baylee that everything isn't always about making yourself happy...that you can simply make yourself happy by helping others. I am so proud of her because this is something that she has picked up so well!

It is funny that the little things make you feel so good......a hug, a smile, a kind word, holding a door open or any small gesture of kindness.

I am glad that Baylee learned so well because I can learn (or be reminded) simply by watching her. I am very bless to have such a sweet daughter. :-)

Sarcasm in School...

......isn't always the best policy! Even when you ARE just playing around and not trying to be rude. I asked yesterday how she did in school yesterday and she said I got an "R" for rudness. I asked her "Fooorrrr whhhattt???". The story goes a little something like this...

Substitute Teacher: “Baylee”

Baylee: “That’s my name. You got questions and I got answers.”

So this officially makes me a bad mom because I couldn't help but laugh. I called Brian and told him and he laughed harder than I did! She said mom I wasn't trying to be rude I was just letting her know I knew the answers. LOL!

We don't know WHERE in the WORLD she gets it from...

Short N' Sweet...

Nothing real important to report right now. Maybe because it is 6:30 in the morning and I am too tired to think! Anyway, maybe I will think of something later?? HA!!! Just wanted to stop in and let everyone know that all is well in the Garrett househould. Just super busy as always!



Smiles!!!

Ombud-what?

That is the response I get from everyone when they hear that I am going to be an Ombudsman! Ha! I will actually be a co-ombudsman with another wife in my husband's unit. She is one of the sweetest people I know. Her family is so precious to me and her husband help my husband...for lack of a better phrase...change his life! In turn it has helped us changes ours. We are totally different in our relationship than we have ever been and much thanks to this family!! In saying that I am very honored to co-ombudsman with her! :-) I went to a training class in Portsmouth, VA. I met some very nice people...which I am sure will be lifelong coastie friends! I learned SOOOO much. I need to sit down and write it all down before I forget. While there I got to visit with a good friend and see some pretty cool stuff...that will be another post. For those that still don't know....

An Ombudsman serves as a link between a Coast Guard command and the families of the command. An Ombudsman can assist families in locating resources, communicate information from the command to the families, and take concerns of families to the command.

:-) Later!!!

Prayer Request!!

For anyone that may read this:

I have been out of the office this morning b/c my mom had to go to the hospital last night. She was feeling real “down”, left arm pain, chest pain, face pain, etc. They took her to St. Dominic’s and her blood pressure was very high. It took them all night to get it down. They have taken EKG’s, blood work, etc. They still have more tests to run this afternoon. They said all her symptoms were those of a heart attack and are watching her close. They said with the test it will be one way or the other…if they see something they will do surgery immediately; otherwise, it may have been stressed induced and she hopefully will be able to go home. In less than a year she has lost her mom, had major neck surgery, husband lost his job and just the normal stresses of a working mom/wife. (I still have a 14 year old brother that lives at home.) Please be in prayer for her that perhaps this was just stressed induced and not anything serious. Also, please pray if it is stressed induced that she will be able to get some relief soon.Also, Brian is at the coast this week and I will be leaving to go out of town. I always get nervous when we leave Baylee. I know she is going to be perfectly fine and is in the best hands but…hey…I am a mom. That is what we do…worry!! I will be flying out Thursday morning and coming back Saturday night. (Unless things change w/my mom.) Please say prayers for safe travel.I have a lot to do here at work and at home before I leave so I am not sure how much I will be around a computer/phone so if I don’t respond to emails/calls just leave me a message and I will get back to you tonight/in the morning!!! Love to all! Thank you,

Bouncy...

...yup that is how I am feeling...kind of bouncy. This week has been SUPER busy but it has been really good. Work has gone great. I have been worried because as paralegals we have to meet a certain amount of hours each year. It has started out well. I guess that is all for now!! My post have been short and sweet lately but I am just trying to put SOMETHING on here. It really relieves alot of stress to blog...not matter how small!!!

January Rears Its Ugly Head!

Hello everyone!! Well it is 2009 and Obama is president...whooda thunk it! Ha!!

Hope everyone had a good Christmas!! Ours was great. Very busy. We ended up celebrating 10 times. It seemed crazy in the midst of it but before we knew it all the celebrations were over...and it almost seemed too soon!!

The year started out pretty good for us so far...but I guess I should speak too soon...it is only the 7th! Baylee just got back from Knoxville. She had to get right back into school and a book project...already!! She has been a trooper about it all. Much better than I have. Getting back into the swing of things and a normal schedule at work has been pretty tough. I am hanging in there though!! As for Brian, the same as usual...hunting, working on this and that, working at Yamaha, Coast Guard and getting ready to take his EMT national registry test. He leaves next week to go to New Mexico for a week. Then he turns around in February and goes to the Coast for a week. Us girls are gonna miss him...but at least it is better than the 8 months he was away the year he went to Cuba!!

Well I guess that is all for now! Happy New Year Everyone!

Love to all!

Baylee Tales

Baylee went to Knoxville with her grandparents this past week and this is a conversation she had with her great-uncle:

Uncle: (Points to a castle in Gatlinburg) and says "That's where they rescue princesses like you from."

Baylee replies: "I don't want to be rescued, I want to slay the dragon!"

I guess she gets that from Brian. LOL!!!!!!!!!

Family Meeting - January

I have decided beginning this year we will have monthly family meetings. We had our first official family meeting last night. It was interesting. We all listed our goals of things we want to achieve (big & small) throughout the next year. We also talked about things that each of us would like for the others to do more/less of. It was kind of neat to see every ones thoughts and be able to talk without anyone getting their feelings hurt. We also discussed our vacation plans for the year. Brian had me print off the list so we can put it on the fridge and see what we have/haven't done. Then each month we will strike through the things we have done or add things to the list. I am interested to see how things change month to month.

Two of the thing we decided to do are family game night and family learning night. Family game night we have done before but we have decided to do it again. One night every other week. We will eat, clean, homework, etc. as usual but in lieu of watching t.v. we will play a game!

The newest thing we are adding is family learning night. We are going to have one night every other week where we all get together and discuss something new about our "learning" subject. We have all expressed the desire to learn to speak Spanish. So we are going to learn to do that ALONG with learning historical information and cultures of the different countries that speak Spanish and where they are located on the map. Once every couple of months we are going to cook a meal as a family that is dedicated to countries we have learned about. We are also going to try to use the Spanish words we learn in place of their English counterpart when conversing at home in order to become more fluent. I see a vacation to Spain in our near future! Ha!

Life Is So Short

I have been sad since I heard about John Travolta's son dying today...all from hitting his head on the bathtub. I am so sad for his family!! I guess this really gets to me this week because Baylee is gone with her grandparents to Knoxville and I have missed her so much and worried about her. She is in great hands but just like this situation...you never know what can happen. Anyway, just had to post this and get it off my chest. :-(

Weight Loss Journey!

Well I am beginning weight loss journey. Yesterday I created a chart to help me keep up with my calories, etc. I went ahead and ate as usal yesterday. I really didn't think it was that bad b/c I really didn't eat alot...but the calorie intake...INSANE! I just ate three basic meals and a snack. I didn't even eat alot at the meals...no more than the regular serving. All of that being said...here it is..*gulp*..I ate OVER 3300 calories yesterday!!!!! YYIIKKEESS!!! I am just in shock. I really don't eat that much but this just goes to prove it is WHAT I eat that is so bad! It is aggravating b/c I know others that eat so much more. I just have to learn that MY body is different and I have to work hard to get it back to where it needs to be!! So here is my "before" picture: