Standing Strong!

So far so good! I am coming to the end of my fourth day and so far it has been good! I have really wanted to cave in a few times but I have held strong! I keep telling myself it is worth it...I AM WORTH it!!! So not great inspiration here or awesome words but just I know I can do this...I can, I can, I can...I WILL! Thought I would add an old photo of myself the last time I was "small" as added inspiration!

This photo was taken on "Senior Day" in my last year of high school! I used this photo because I specifically remember this day and remember how embarrassed I was because I felt so "fat" in this dress!!!! Do I look fat? Ummm...if I were to only be "that fat". :-) 

TG's Daily Total: 1/18/12

Meals: 6 shakes (1200 - Used skim milk.)

2 Ocean Spray water packs (10 Calories)

Water: 9 glasses

Exercise: Nada! :/

Other: Nothing!

Same thing two days in a row!

Redoing My Game Plan!

So far I am actually feeling good! Yesterday I didn't seem to feel as well but today I just feel like I have a lot of energy. I am really not "hungry" at all but lots of things sound good. For instance, I am not even a dorritos fan but Baylee was eating some and I can almost envision how good they would taste. We also have some powdered donuts here but fortunately they haven't sounded good. I dreamed yesterday about eating a pickle and a burger from Krystal. It really is mind over matter I think. I thought I could get something and no one would not the difference but for once I thought...I WOULD. Not to mention one little chip would completely ruin what I am working towards. I keep telling myself I have had over 32 years to eat what I want & like I read on another person's website...the food isn't going anywhere. I can always eat later on when I am healthier and can eat just a small serving of something bad occasionally. I came across a gem of a website about a lady who has been doing OptiFAST (the program I am basing my fast off of). She has said so many informative things. Between reading her website (optifastblog.wordpress.com) and watching the show Traci suggested (Fat, Sick & Nearly Dying) I feel really good about my decision to make this change in my life. I am glad that day three has gone so well and I am in hopes that the rest of the week continues to go just as well!

So my plan redo is this (based on the things I have read):

Month 1: Continue with my shakes/water only for the remainder of my four weeks.

Month 2: Morning slim fast bar/1 cup milk; lunch shake; afternoon snack chicken broth; dinner shake

Month 3: Morning slim fast bar/1 cup milk; lunch shake; afternoon snack chicken broth; dinner 4 oz chicken and 1/2 cup of veggies

Month 4: Morning slim fast bar/1 cup milk; salad; afternoon snack chicken broth; dinner 4 oz chicken and 1/2 cup of veggies

TG's Daily Total: 1/17/12

Meals: 6 shakes (1200 - Used skim milk.)

2 Ocean Spray water packs (10 Calories)

Water: 9 glasses

Exercise: Nada! :/

Other: Nothing other than benadryl & ibuprofen!

I have decided this week & maybe even next week I am not going to stress too much on the exercise. If it happens it happens!

TG's Daily Total: 1/16/12

Even if I don't get a chance to do this everyday I am going to try to do it as often as possible. As I said before I am doing "shakes" for a month. Might not be the right choice for everyone but this is my "jump-start". On week five I will add in something at breakfast (taking away one of my shakes), week 6 I will add in something at lunch (taking away another shake) and week 7 I will add in something at dinner taking away another shake, week 8 I will add a morning snack (taking away another shake!) and week 9 add an afternoon snack (taking away the final shakes!).

1/16/12

Meals: 6 shakes (1440 Calories)

2 Ocean Spray water packs (10 Calories)

Water: 12 glasses

Exercise: Nada! :/

Other: Multi-vitamin, Vitex Berry (For my female stuff!), hydroxycut (I have one bottle that I have taken before and I am only taking half the dose a day until the bottle runs out to get me used to not eating much each day!)

Prayerfully Losing

WOW...it has been four years since we have used this site! To make matters worse...I haven't even lost/maintained in that time. I have actually PUT ON weight since the very first time we ever posted on this site. I am the biggest I have ever been and when I did my virtual model this morning it wouldn't even go UP to my weight. It is sad, really. I don't know why I just can't manage to lose weight BUT what I do know is it is now time. I have four good motivations this year though:

1. We are going on our first cruise in May. I want to look better, feel better and most of all be happy to take photos at all the fun places we go!
2. Brian's college graduation will be late this summer and I don't want to be the "fat" wife. These are photos to keep forever in remembrance of a great day and I don't want to "hate" looking at myself.
3. My 15 year reunion! I was the "fat" fun & friendly girl at our 10 year reunion and could not find a THING to wear. I want to be able to be cute this time around!
4. My college graduation! I don't want to look like I am wearing a "moomoo" in my graduation cap & gown!

So what am I doing you ask? Well I know some people will turn their nose up at this but this is important to me. I am one of those people that has to see numbers to keep me motivated. I think in a long time the greatest amount of weight I have lost is maybe 20lbs. (Not sure about this tho...will have to look through old post!) I have worked with attorneys who did the liquid diet thing through a local hospital. I have a friend who has done the Optifast diet. Well I decided I am going along these same lines. I am doing a liquid diet (Brian will monitor my BP, etc. at home.) for the next month. I am going to make sure I meet adequate calories, drink plenty of water and take my vitamins. I am going to get in a gallon of water daily as well as a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise.

After the 30 days, you slowly add in "healthy" foods. I am so embarrassed after weighing this morning that I decided I am not sharing my starting weight with anyone until after my four weeks is up. So on February 13th...I will post my starting weight and my weight after the four weeks. Good or bad...I will post both numbers.

I also put a water tracker on my phone (not getting enough liquids each day is a huge downfall for me!) as well as downloaded a blogger link so I have no excuse to not blog because I can do it straight from my phone! I will now put in my very first virtual model which is not actually my very first starting weight because it won't go that high! I will also try to find some fairly recent starting photos.

Update:

I remembered two other things I want to lose for other than the obvious of being healthy & the things listed above! One is that my friends got a boat late last summer and we will be out on it more and I want to be comfortable when I am out there! Also, our family always goes to the lake in the summer and I want to be ready!

Getting My Study On!!

I was reading another blog about nursing that was talking about Making the Grade. It really got me to thinking...I have no idea how to study or motivate myself to study for the next two years of nursing school! I have got to find a good way to retain all the information that will be thrown at me starting Monday. It will probably be a trial and error process but I sure hope it doesn't take me long to figure it out!

Nursing School: Uniform & Supplies

Nursing School: Update

California Girl! :o)

Okay...well not really a Cali girl but what I pretended to be for a week! :o) While Brian was out training in San Diego I got the opportunity to go out and visit him. We had a blast! We saw Old Town San Diego, Pt Loma, La Jolla, SEALS! on the beach!, beautiful sunsets, USS Midway, San Diego Zoo, Balboa Park, Sea World, etc. We even made a road trip to L.A. It was soo much fun! We got to touch and see all the handprints in the concrete in front of the Chinese Theatre. We also got to walk down and look at all the "stars" on the sidewalk. It was really awesome! When we were getting ready to leave Hollywood we saw them setting up for the Salt premier. It was awesome to thing in just a matter of hours so many famous people would be walking down that carpet! Once we left there we went to RODEO DRIVE! It was amazing to see all the famous stores. My favorite part was to see the Beverly Wilshire! It is where Pretty Woman was filmed. I am a HUGE Julia Roberts fan. I even went in and used the facilities. LOL I can't wait to go back again!

All in all it was a great trip! It was hard to leave my hubby knowing that in just a few days after I left that he was heading overseas but it is an experience we were both so glad to have shared together! I love him!

Nursing School: Acceptance

Nursing School...Acceptance?

Well.....BIG NEWS! I have been super stressed about the fact that I wasn't going to be able to start anytime soon. I even "stooped" to the level of going to a not so popular college and taking a class I really didn't want to take. I leave from my meeting at said school and get home...check the mail....ANNNNNNDDDDD.....I get a letter from the school! They said that I am an alternate for the fall semester. Which means that if someone doesn't show or drops out...I get their spot! ALSO, it guarantees me 100% a spot in the Spring Semester NO MATTER WHAT! So it is official....if not sooner...I will at least be a nursing student in the Spring!!

Residual Act...bleh!

Yup I took mine today. Not looking forward to the results. I am willing to bet they are probably lower than the first time I took it over 13 years ago! We shall see how it goes! I really hope it helps my chances of getting into Nursing School for the Spring! :o)

Oh Lindsey!

*Sigh* Even though she tends to be a little wild I have always liked Lindsey Lohan as an actress. Today she goes to Court and is upset to know that she is sentenced to 90 days in jail. I just don't get it. She has it all fame, fortune, beauty, and she just can't seem to get it together. She says in court that she learned her lesson but shouldn't she have learned it after the first time? I don't know. I just don't get it. I guess all the above mentioned (fame, fortune, etc.) really just isn't enough. I am not sure what it is about these talented actresses and actors. I don't know if it is the lack of "real" friends in their lives or just the stress of fame that causes them to make such poor decisions. Either that or maybe they thing they are invincible. I really hope after this she really does straighten her life out.

Old Blogs!

Well I have decided...as part of my ever growing "to do" list...I am going to go back to my "old blog" and insert my "old post" into this blog (in date order). I don't really know why. Other than the fact to have a complete "blog" of all things I have posted since I began blogging many many years ago! I really wish I could get back into like I once was. I loved it. Still do but it is hard to keep it going in this world of social networking sites such as My Space or Facebook. Either way, like I have always said this is just more for my purposes and my way to "journal" my thoughts. :o)

WDW & My Coastie! :o)

I am up and wide awake this morning! Yes it is 4:00 a.m. Yes I realize half the world is still asleep. Actually, sleeping crazy hours has been the trend for me since I got sick last week. Over a week later and I am still fighting it off! I was diagnosed with Bronchitis but at the beginning of the week it really felt more like whooping cough. Especially, since none of my medicine was working! However, through lots of prayer from family and friends I am here to report that I am feeling much better!

Once I finish typing this post I will begin loading my car. My daughter and I are leaving this morning to meet my dad and family in Orlando. We are going to spend a week at Disney. I believe that this is most of their first time. It is Baylee's second trip and my 5th. We are very excited. The only two things I have been a little concerned about are the two girls getting along all week. They are both sweet but both used to being only children. :o) Other than that, I worry how things are going to go at the parks because as you know in a big group not everyone is interested in the same things. My family is pretty great so I really don't see this as a worry! They are going to want everyone to do what makes them happy.

The most exciting news is after 49 days of not seeing my hubby - HE IS FLYING IN TO ORLANDO ON HIS LEAVE TIME TO VISIT WITH BAYLEE AND I! We are so very excited about it. Now to any other military family 49 days may not seem like a long time but this is the longest we have gone without seeing each other since his last deployment. Also, we are excited because when his unit began this journey we really were not sure that we would get to see them again before they returned from their deployment in the Spring of 2011. So this is just a blessing in disguise. I was actually going to come home and he fly here but he said he would rather come there so he can get some good quality alone time with Baylee. This will be officially the last time he sees her until next year!

Well I guess I better close this out and begin to load the car! My family things we won't be there until tomorrow but the truth is we will be there only a few hours after they arrive this afternoon!

Robitussin Take Me Away!!!

I feel bad. I mean I don't mean just the regular blahs. I am talking about laying in bed all week coughing and hacking. Brian makes fun of me when we talk because he thinks it sounds like I am barking like a dog. Yup that is how we know when it is bronchitis...Brian barks back. I have drank fluids, I have laid around all week, and I have drank Robitussin the past two days like it is going out of style! I REALLY hope I am feeling better by tomorrow. :( My house is a disgusting wreck. I mean REALLY bad. I haven't done a thing all week because when I move I cough. When I cough it hurts. When it hurts I choke. When I choke I get sick. Anyone that knows me knows I don't handle "getting sick" well. So here I lay...I am actually getting up right now to wash clothes and try to pick up a FEW things so the house won't be such a disaster. I am going to pick Baylee up from USM choir camp and I PRAY I don't start coughing during the middle of the program!!

Vent of a Military Wife!

If you could see my face today...you would know that
<-----this is what I look like. I am so glad that people want to support our troops...which is great! However, at what point do the wives get supported. I guess today I was more hurt than aggravated at a response I got. I mentioned how bad I was hurting having my sweet husband gone. After all, he and I have a wonderful relationship and he is truly my best friend. I am so glad people are praying for him and I am so glad they miss him. I guess it is just hurtful to me that no one wants to just come out and say...we are praying for you and Baylee or we are sorry that you are so sad. I guess one thing that maybe others don't understand is Brian was not called to go on this deployment. His Cuba deployment his HAD to go no questions asked. However, this deployment he along with all the brave men and women in his unit volunteered to go! I don't say this to take away from what they are doing because I think it is amazing but I do just wish people would be more supportive to the wives of our troops. I can stand here and support him forever but at some point I will need to be supported as well.

Man in Uniform

A few weeks ago, for one of our nephews birthdays, I got an idea. I called Brian and told him I thought it would be a neat idea to take a picture in his uniform holding a sign telling him happy birthday. I hate I thought of it so late because we weren't able to get it to him right on his birthday. Either way, glad to have it! I hope we can keep up the tradition while Brian is deployed...at least for immediate family and maybe our few closest friends. It is a good way to show why Brian wasn't here but it also give us a time time of photos while he is gone.

His unit is leaving out for their second phase of training this morning. He sent me an email that says "Good morning. I love you." He also attached this picture.

It was so good to wake up and see him this morning. I miss him so very much. :)

Brian Days

What are "Brian Days" you may ask? Brian days are when I am totally missing my sweet husband. These days are those days that get so bad that sometimes I feel like I can't breathe! It makes me so sad when he is gone but I support him and want him to do what makes him happy! So today has definitely been a sad "Brian Day" but I am trying to think of the positive. Thank goodness I have a man to love and miss so much. The same one that loves and misses me too! He is definitely the love of my life!