Dear Diary

We are accountable. Accountable for what you say? Ourselves and each other! I agree 100% with what Traci has said below. No one else may ever read this site...it may just be Traci and Tiff telling the world (or no one in particular) how life is! So I am just as guilty as Traci as not blogging. Reading your blogs Traci make me feel more motivated. I was so excited to see there was actually a post on this site! It has been awhile. So not only are we accountable to ourselves and our children but we have to be accountable to each other. To see you on here makes me more motivated to go with it! When we were blogging I was losing weight but the minute one of us slacks off BOTH of us slack off! So from now on I am going to try to remember it is not just me on here. I have to keep doing this for you, too! I am from now on going to be just accountable for your struggles as I am my own!! We CAN do this. The fact that we have even kept this site up is impressive in itself! That is step one!!! We just need to move beyond that! We can do it!!!!

Dear Diary...

Ok, so I got all motivated yet again and that lasted for about 2 days. It’s time to get with and stick with the program….once and for all!!! When I first started counting calories back in December, I stuck with it. Not a day went by that I was over 1300 calories. I’ve thought about what was different now from then and the ONLY thing that I was doing differently was blogging about it. I was writing about my progress everyday and I wanted the whole cyber world to know how I was doing. However, let’s face it we weren’t winning any blog awards or getting 100 hits a day. It was just me and Tiff. Looking back, I realized the blogging was really more for my own reading than anything. At that time, I felt like it was a waste of time to be blogging my progress because no one was reading it. But then again, do I really care if a bunch of strangers know how I’m doing? No, not really. So, I’m back. I’m blogging for the whole world of me to read. It keeps me on track. I would refer to this site as being more of a diary or journal than it is a blog. However anyone that wants the key to it, can have it and read it without the guilt that goes along with snooping into someone else’s private little world. I guess in the back recesses of my mind, I would hope that some other overweight, overwhelmed mom would stumble upon it and feel inspired to get up off of her own lazy butt and take control of her life. Regardless of that though, this mom is going to do exactly that and who cares if anyone else knows about it or gives me praise for it. So, for all of you out there that aren’t reading this or don’t even know it exist, get ready because I am back on the wagon and I’m not looking back.

Here We Go Again - For The Hundreth Time!!

So I started again today! Hopefully, this time will be better. I would like to be down a couple of pounds by my 27th birthday. I just recently heard of JUST THIS WEEK someone my age dying of a heart attack! I can't imagine! Anyway, I am just trying to spread smaller meals out through the day. Here is what I had today.

8:00 - Honeybun & Glass of Milk
9:30 - 8oz Water
11:30 - Pickle spear, half of roast beef sandwich (wheat w/mustard) & a quater of ham sandwich (wheat w/mustard) - 16 oz water
12:45 - 8oz of Water
2:15 - 6 crackers with Tuna Fish on it
3:50 - Dole peaches w/strawberry jello fruit cup

I plan on getting more water in and eating a light dinner. I have alot to do around the house as far as unpacking from vacation and getting ready for bunco this week SO I will see about exercising or not tonight - depends on if I have time!!

Works For Me Wednesday & Sad News

WORKS FOR ME WEDNESDAY

My works for me Wednesday this week is a short and sweet one. To make your car smell nice in the summer time you can do one of two things very cheap! If you have any half used or melted candles - you can put them in a plastic grocery bag and tie the bag up and place under the seat of your car. For a stronger smell you can place it in some sort of plastic bowl etc without the lid and when your car heats up from the summer sun it fills your car with a wonderful smell! The second is to do the same thing but use a bar of soap - the kind with fragrance. I know short and sweet!

SAD NEWS

The first thing is one of my grandmothers passed away last night. It was expected and we know she is no longer in pain but hard on the family none the less. Please keep our family in your prayers.

Also, recently I had two very close friends hurt me. It was quite possibly unintentional. I am not mad but just hurt. After I was confronted I prayed about it and then decided to respond with honesty about how I felt about the situation. More over I just asked that we all just try to start over on a clean slate and life is too short and too hard for friendship to be a "competition" or for friendship not to be "50/50" in the giving department. I am not asking for a big explaination. I would love just to hear for once from both of them "I am sorry I hurt you and lets ALL work on this together and get our friendship back in order." We have been friends since Jr. High so it makes it tough. Anyway, I haven't heard back which makes me sad but you can only do so much. I want to contact them but I am not going to beg anyone to be my friend. If they want to be then I will just pray that they will try to see my side and confront me and lets move on from this. I would love to have them over this weekend and lets just relax and start fresh but I see no way of that happening unless they get back with me first.

So the sadness of both of these things is overwhelming today.

It's A Girl!

I found out bright and early this morning that my best friend is having a baby girl! Yeah! She already has one beautiful daughter so I am sure this one will be just as beautiful! Now I REALLY have baby fever! Ha!

Counting Calories

Tiffany asked me to share some of my calorie counting tips, so here ya go...

To begin, I'm shooting for 1200-1300 calories during the week and 1500 on the weekends.

I started by deciding a calorie range for my 5 meal times. This way if it's dinner time and I don't know my current calorie total for the day, I still know about what range I need to keep it in.
Breakfast - 200
Lunch - 400
Snack - 100
Dinner - 400-500
Snack - 100
(I add 200 calories to either lunch or dinner on the weekends)
If I only eat 150 at breakfast, then I'll keep that in mind for the rest of the day that I can do an additional 50 at one of my meals. Vice Versa, if I go over by 50, I know that I have to cut one meal by 50.

I keep notes of what I eat on the computer, because I'm just not good at writing things down and keeping up with it. I try to keep a running total in my head for the day though. To make this easier, I round calories up or down to the nearest 10th. So if breakfast was 283, I would round down to 280. It's just easier to remember a whole number.

When I cook something, I take the time to literally write down the calories of every ingredient I use in each dish. It's actually kind of fun to see how much is actually in the whole dish. Once I have my total, I will keep dividing the total by a number until the calories get into my range. That tells me how many servings the dish is. I then visually divide the dish into that many servings to decide how much I can eat. For instance my baked spaghetti dish has 3690. If I divide it by 9 then a serving is 410 calories and that leaves 90 calories for my salad. So, then I visually divide it up into 9 servings (sometimes I will actually draw a line through the food with my utensil) If I was just having the spaghetti then I would divide by 8 and have a 461 calorie serving. It sounds kind of time consuming but it's really not. Also, if an ingredient doesn't have calorie content on the package, for instance veggies or fresh meat, I use Calorie King to get my calorie info.

We eat out about twice a week for dinner and I usually go out at lunch to pick something up. The first thing I did when I started counting was to go to the website of the restaurants that we go to frequently. Most of them offer nutritional content online. I went through the menus and found things that fall between my ranges; give or take a little. I then made a list of just those items and I keep it in my car. So if I decide to go to Chick-Fil-A for lunch, I can just glance at the list and decide what I want. I don't have to ask for nutritional info when I get there or look it up before I go. Also if we are going out to a restaurant where the menus are brought to your table. I don't even pick up my menu, because thanks to my handy list, I've already decided what I want. It also helps me not to be tempted by the "bad" things on the menu. Of course we do go to a restaurant every now and then that I don't have on my list. Hopefully they have calorie content on the menu, if not I use what I know and make my best attempt at ordering healthy and then I look up those foods when I get home. My last restaurant tip is one of my faves. If you want to indulge a bit and get something on the menu that is way over your range, go for it but ask to have half of it put in a to-go container before the food is even brought out. You'll be glad you did come lunchtime tomorrow when you get to dine on your favorite food for the second day in a row!! Overtime I have learned what I can have and really don't have to rely on the list anymore, but it's good to have around.

I don't deprive myself from something I really want when counting calories. If I am really craving something that's high in calories, I eat it. I just count it in my calories. So, if it's worth it to kill an extra 300 calories at lunch, that's fine, I just have to cut it somewhere else. Most times, I will only eat half of whatever my craving is. For instance if it's 2:30 and a Snickers bar screams my name when I walk by the vending machine, I may get it and only eat half. So of my 100 calories allowed at my afternoon snack, I went over by 40. So I just have to cut them at snack time tonight or at dinner. If I decide to eat the whole thing, then I have to cut 180 somewhere else.

For me, counting calories isn't about dieting and only eating veggies and fruit. I can eat whatever I want, but within reason. It's about being very conscious of everything I put in my mouth.

There is one downside. Your husband will get sick and tired of you being able to ramble off the calorie content of everything he eats as well. I guess a Large Dairy Queen Reese's Blizzard isn't as good when you've just learned that it's got a total of 1011 calories in it! Fortunately, he and his 2% body fat can handle it.

Monday Stats - Traci

B - South Beach High Protein Cereal Bar - 140
L - Arby's Grilled Chicken Sante Fe Salad, 1/2 pkg dressing, 1/2 pkg tortilla strips - 491
S - NONE
D - 2 Homemade Corn Dogs - 420, 13 tostitos - 160, dipping sauce - 50 = 1261
S - NONE

Total Calories - 1261
Total Water - 58
Total Exercise - none

DITTO...

I'm trying again as well. Today is day one of "try" number 3,285!

I'm going back to counting calories. I'm going to start posting them again too. As silly as it may seem, when I was posting them I did much better. I know nobody else really cares what I eat, but it helps me so I'm going to keep doing it.

So here's (toasting my bottle of water to the air) to day one for both us!!

By the way, I weighed in this morning at *wincing" 219! That's up 6 lbs since 4/13/06! Whoa!!

Good Times

Good Evening - Happy Father's Day - Almost anyway! Ha! Thought I would come in and do a quick post. In the mood for posting! I had one of the best nights I have had in a very long time! Wow! I know it doesn't sound like much but my husband, myself, our daughter, her friend, and 3 friends of ours came over for the afternoon/night. We started out the evening by going father's day shopping - yes late I know! Then we came back home and ate our "first" serving of gumbo that I had worked on preparing for hours! IT was SO good! I was so impressed with myself! :-) I am a "okay" kinda cook. Every once in awhile I get something right and "baam!" it is good. Through out the night we each had at least one more bowl. Then we fought with the ice cream maker and finally had home made ice cream - twice! Ha! We laughed for hours on end - until I had tears in my eyes. Afterwards, we watched a movie and now they have just left.

"So what was so good about that night?", you ask. It is the fact that I got to sit around with my friends, in the comfort of my own home and enjoy myself and "really relax" for the first time in a long time. I really think - and know from what they told me a few minutes ago before they left - that we all had one of the best nights we have had in a long time. Today I am grateful for good friends and good times.

Trying It Again

This will be a short and sweet post! I have been slacking lately with so much going on! The past month has been C-R-A-Z-Y! Not only have I been slacking on my blogging but on my weight loss, too! So starting Monday I am going to try weight watchers again. In full force - drinking water, exercising, etc! I will keep you posted!

Well it has been awhile!!!

I have been SO busy but I decided to start back off on the right foot with the wonderful Works-for-Me Wednesday hosted by RocksInMyDryer.typepad.com!

SO my WFMW is kind of a recipe. I just learned it and have already used it. If you are like me occasionally you run out of snacks or the kiddos (Or you!) just want something to snack on. For a super quick yummy treat that the can help make try this:

5 Minute Homemade Ice Cream - 1 Serving

1. 1 Quart Size ziploc bag.
2. 1 Gallon Size ziploc bag.
3. 1 cup milk
4. 1 tsp. vanilla
5. 2 tablespoons sugar
6. 12 ice cubes
7. 3 tbsp of salt

• Put the milk, vanilla and sugar in the quart size bag - press the air out and seal bag.
• Place the ice cubes, salt and then the quart size bag (with the milk "mixture" that is sealed really tight, right?!) inside the gallon bag.
• Seal the gallon bag.
• For the next several minutes - possibly up to five. Let the kids twist, roll, flip and turn this bag.
• The ice/salt in the gallon size bag helps freeze the "milk mixture" in the quart size bag into a yummy treat!!
• Once the mixture looks to be the consistancy of homemade ice cream you take the quart size bag out and rinse the outside of it. (To get the salt off!)
• Then pour in a bowl or eat directly out of the bag - Enjoy!

Mommy Dilemma!!!

My Cousin Traci over at Mostly Precious Moments is having a Mommy dilemma!!! Go over and read her post and leave her some advice if you can! Thanks!!!

Weigh In Wednesday: Tiff

Well I went up a little since last week. Actually I had gone up 2.4 pounds but lost back down to this. We started working out (doing cardio and lifting weights) so I am being patient and giving it time!! I have noticed that my arms aren't "as" flabby and some of the fat already seems to be replaced by muscle! Slowly but surely! I am sticking with it!

WFMW

My WFMW post will be short and sweet this week! I actually got this idea from a friend not too long ago and tried it out and it works! Here you go:

For a streak free cleaning for windows use newspaper instead of paper towels when you windex.

There you go - my short and sweet insight for today!

Traci over at Mostly Precious Moments started a new column called "On the Menu Monday". I think it is a great idea to get some great recipes!

The recipe I decided to do is one of my hubbies favorites. I actually got it from my mom because she cooked it at home when I was younger and in turn she got it from someone at church. So I don't know where it originated but it is delicious! It is great for parties or can be served with a side salad as a meal!

Sausage Loaf

1 lb sausage (I use mild but you can use hot)
1/2 cup onions, chopped
1/2 cup celery, chopped
2 eggs
1/4 cup milk
1/2 teaspoon sage
2 cups mild cheddar cheese, grated
1 loaf French bread

1. Brown sausage.
2. Add onions and celery and cook until tender.
3. Drain.
4. Mix egg, milk, pepper, and sage.
5. Slice off top of bread lengthwise and remove insides. (It should leave a hollow loaf - do not discard "insides")
6. Add bread "insides"to egg mixture and sausage mixture and mix well. (Depending on how much of a hurry I am in I sometimes take the "insides" of the loaf and put them in the food processor to make crumbs!)
7. Put the bottom of the loaf on foil and add mixture topped with cheese.
8. Put top on this and brush with butter.
9. Wrap in foil and bake for 20 minutes at 400 degrees.
10. Slice (easier with an electric knife!) and serve hot!

Children, Exercise & Coke In Schools

This morning on the radio I heard them talking about pepsi & coca cola signing an agreement to take all regular pepsi & coke out of the vending machines (leaving water, diet drinks, etc.). I am not sure if this is just in Mississippi or if it is nationwide. They had callers telling their opinion of this and most of them agreed with it. I, as a mom, agree with it for more than one reason. One of which is that childhood obesity is at a staggering high. Not to mention that the sugar in these (and other drinks) is horrible for your teeth! So I will say that I am very impressed with this. I think that they are following the trends that even McDonald's and Wendy's have begun following. They even offer you children a choice of milk & fruit cup instead of coke & fries. I think it is a great idea.

We began this week working out in our household! (Lord help me!) My daughter (who is 8) stays in the childcare center while we workout. Afterwards, as a family we all walk/job a short distance. I think it is a good time to start getting her used to the idea of exercise.

What do you think about the Pepsi/Coca Cola in schools?

Do your children "exercise" or do you have any tips that I could use to get my daughter to enjoy exercise more?

I would love to hear about them!

Weigh-In Wednesday: Tiff

So when I first started this "journey" in the fall of 2005 I was 262. When we started this blog I was 258. So counting from the original of 262 my total weight loss as of today is: 18.4 pounds!

Actually, Sunday I weighed and it was 242 so it would have been 20 but I will take 18.4! I need to lose SO much more than that! One day at a time!

We started working out this week and I hope my Wednesday Weigh-In's from here on out will look great!

Shannon over at Rocks In My Dryer has started a new column called "Works-For-Me Wednesday". She has invited others to "play" along so you can go to her site and check out all the other great ideas. Also, there will be a link on the side bar called "Works-For-Me Wednesday" that will allow you to come back and look at the great ideas later in the week if you need too!

So my tip of the week is this: Travel Time Treats

Some may already know of this but if you don't this is a great way to keep kids entertained on a long trip. I take zip lock bags and put not only snacks for the trip but small toys, games, books all in their own bags. The trick is to buy small "travel" type games and toys (I am talking C.H.E.A.P. - like from the Everything's A Dollar Store) and keep them in a bag up front with you and not let the kids see them "at all" until it is time to pass them out. Then everytime they start to get fussy you pull out something "new". I have even done this with toys out of my daughter's room that she didn't know I brought. The reason it works so well is because if you give them everything all at once they get "bored". If you give them things "they don't even know you have" spread out through the trip they will play longer with each toy instead of the usual, "Are we there yet?" after five minutes. I am sure this works with kids of all ages but it really worked very well when my daughter was younger and just she and I would make long trips to visit family, etc.

Not much but that is what I have to offer this week!

Look Good While Getting In Shape

So I did my first work out last night and as usual I had "those" feelings. You know the ones - everyone is looking at you like "rookie" or "what is she doing here", etc. The thing is I am SURE it is all in my mind and no one is paying the least bit of attention to me. I came across this article at IVillage called Look Good While Getting In Shape. I enjoyed it and I thought I would share with those who may decide to venture out to a "public" gym! We can do it!

I Need My Space People!!!

I am a touch feely person. I hug just about everyone. I don't usually get bothered by people "invading" my space. However there are two instances that really bother me: #1 Please don't talk TWO inches from my face. Why does anyone need to be that close? I mean really? #2 Please don't stand two inches from me while I am waiting in line. Last night #2 happened. I was waiting in line at the store with TWO things in my hand. There was a lady behind me who stood at the front right hand side of her buggy - she was standing DIRECTLY behind me - I could feel her breathing on my neck. THEN she pushed her buggy up so far it is LITERALLY pressed against my leg! What was that about? I was keeping my composure but I tell you what this really pushed my buttons! Okay. Feel. Better. Now. Just. Had. To. Vent. Now on to more important things...

On my side bar (right above my pictures) I will add a list called "Columns I Join" and so far I will have a link up to Works-For-Me Wednesday (Hosted by Shannon @ Rocks In My Dryer) and On The Menu Monday (Hosted by Traci @ Mostly Precious Moments). The most current one will be linked every week until the new one comes out - hence I will change the Wednesday one on Wednesdays and the Monday one on Mondays. Each of the "host" will have a links to others that are participating under their post. I encourage you all to participate! It is awesome!

So I will leave you with something I received in an email this morning:

When I Whine
~~~~~~~
Today, upon a bus, I saw a girl with golden hair
I looked at her and sighed and wished I was as fair.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and used a crutch
But as she passed, she passed a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.
~~~
I stopped to buy some candy
The lad who sold it had such charm
I talked with him a while, he seemed so very glad
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.
~~~
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue
He stood and watched the others play
He did not know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others, dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew, he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.
~~~
With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I would know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I've been blessed indeed, The world is mine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sorrow looks back,
Worry looks around,
Faith looks up.

New Beginnings

Today is day one for me also on the "new plan". So far so good. I've said it before and I'll say it again.

WE CAN DO THIS AND WE ARE WORTH THE TIME, MONEY

AND ENERGY THAT IT TAKES!!

Don't look back, it's a new day and a new beginning for us both!

It begins...Again!!!

Well this is my "new" first day! Ha! I ate breakfast this morning, I am drinking water and I brought my lunch. I have my first work out at the gym tonight and I have looked forward to it all weekend!! Hopefully I don't kill over and I will be able to post some about it this week!!

Finally Admitted It!

We were at my mom's house and my hubby walked across the living room and plopped down in the chair with a *groan*.

I said, "Are you getting old?"

He said, "No just lazy.

My 8 year old daughter said without even looking up from her book so "matter of factly", "Well at least you finally admitted it."

I am telling you kids are something else! Where do they come up with these things!

She had us cracking up! All in all we had a pretty good weekend - kinda had some life changing things happen BUT that is another post in itself! Happy Monday to you all!

Fat Day

Yup...this is how I feel today!! I actually am down 2/10 of a pound again but I just feel "fat" today. When I have these days it just makes me want to eat!! I don't get it. What causes these fat days? I have on the same blue jeans I wore last Friday that made me feel so good!!! WHY, WHY, WHY!!! Well I plan on joining the Y this afternoon so hopefully I won't be having too many more "fat days"!!

My Little Artist

My daughter is a pretty talented artist - for her age. I am sure she gets it from her great grandmother and not me!! (My mother-in-law published a book - pictured to the left - containing her moms art - much of which hangs in my home! It can be found here.) I am amazed at some of the things she can come up with. She has made some really great drawings. I really should scan them in one day. Late last fall we were at my cousin's house and Baylee picked up her little boy's "magna" doodle and began to draw. Sometimes it is the intensity and concentration more than the picture itself that amazes me when she draws. She is a very special little girl. It has encouraged me to look around for a possible art class she could take...I have a feeling she could be very good. Like I said before it is not so much the art but the concentration, attention to detail and creativity that she comes up with when she draws! If she could draw a picture of me right now it would be one with a huge smile on my face.

Application to Date My Daughter

*I am telling you my child is just growing up to fast so I decided for future use I need to impliment this application!*

Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage and medical report from your doctor.

Name:________________________ Nickname/Alias:___________________
Date Of Birth:____/____/____ height:______ Weight:______ I.Q.:______ G.P.A.:________ Soc. Sec.#______-___-_______
Driver's License#____________________ Boy Scout Rank:_____________
Good Standing: Yes_____No_____
Home Address:_______________________________ City/State/Zip_____________________________ Home Phone#: (___)___________ Car Phone#:_______________ Pager#:__________

Do you own
a. Van?____ b. Truck with oversized tires?____ c. Car with a trunk full of speakers?_____

Do you have any of the following:
a. An earring_____ b. nose ring______ c. belly button ring_____ or piercings on any other body parts_____ Explain:_____________________________________________________
Tattoo?______ (If you answered YES to any of the above questions, discontinue and leave the premises immediately.)

In 30 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you? ________________________________________________________________
In 30 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? ________________________________________________________________

Church you attend_____________________ How often______________________
Best time to interview your pastor?_______________________
Fill In The Blank. Please answer freely, all answers will be confidential.
a. If I were beaten, the last bone I want to be broken broken is: ____________________________________________________
b. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me is ____________________________________________________
c. Now answer the question you filled in on B ____________________________________________________
NOTE: If you have answered any of the previous questions dishonestly (and I will find out), discontinue application. It is advised that you leave the premises quickly keeping your head low and running in serpentine fashion. I swear that all information provided above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of death, dismemberment, electrocution, and/or hot pokers.
_____________________________ Signature (This means sign your name)

Thank you for your interest. Please allow 4 - 6 YEARS for processing. If your application is approved, you will be contacted in writing. Please do not call or write, this could cause you unexpected injury. If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two men wearing white ties and answering to the names GUIDO and LOUIE.

Re-Inventing Me

My world has been topsy turvy lately! I don't know so much that it has been crazy but I think I have just been focusing on all the wrong things! I have had this site for awhile but it was formally listed as "Mind Diversion". I decided to change it to Garrett's Corner and focus it now more on me and my family and friends. It seems crazy but it is like I am just now finding out who I "really" am. Thank you to all of you that have hung in there with me!

Whew!

My husband likes to work on vehicles. He has had a truck for several years now he was going to "get around" to fixing. Well he got it cranked and drove it around the block. When he got back my daughter asked if he fixed it. He said yes would you like to go for a ride? Well we all piled in and rode around the block. When we pulled in the driveway and got ready to get out my daughter said, "Whew!" *While holding her hand to her chest as if she were having a heart atack!* We looked at her and she just shook her head and got out of the truck like, "Thank Goodness." My husband asked her "Were you scared that I didn't fix it right and we weren't going to make it home?" She said, "Well..." and then to keep from hurting daddy's feelings she turned around and walked inside. It really cracked me up! You know she is a daddy's baby because had anyone else "doubted" him he would have hit the roof! Ha!

Gym Rat

I am not sure but I think I may be going about this whole "weight loss" thing the wrong way. For years I have focused mainly on what I "eat". I could tell you just about everything to eat or not to eat in order to lose weight. I don't think I particularly "over eat" all that often. I have actually gotten better about making "healthier" choices at meals and eating less food. My problem is the very sedentary lifestyle I live. Don't get me wrong with an 8 year old and as much as we do we go quite often but I don't really spend enough time really exercising. I go enough that my body is used to it. Initially I lost some weight because I changed the way I ate. Now I am not losing because I haven't changed my "exercising" habits. SO hopefully in the next couple of weeks the hubby and I will be joining the gym! We are making it a family "effort" to exercise...gulp...at least 5 days a week and my own personal goal of swimming once a week. (Mainly cause I like to swim!) We will see how it goes. I think after I start seeing results I will really get into the whole exercise thing!!

Switchin' it up

So, I have been doing the counting calories thing for quite sometime and I have to be honest....I'm tired of counting!! It has been a really good experience though. I have a much better understanding of what I am eating and I realize how many calories are in some foods that I would have thought otherwise. If you haven't even counted calories, I would highly recommend doing it for a month...it is very eye opening. So I've decided it's time to switch things up.
A friend of mine recently joined a certain weight loss program. Well she shared the info with me and I'm going to try it out. It is very similar to another weight loss program that I did a few years ago. It was great and I lost about 15 lbs in a month... it was just way to expensive. Anyway, the program is a balanced mix of carbs and proteins and you use store bought food. They do recommend their drink supplements. The other program also had drinks supplements. The nutritional content of both are almost identical to these, so I am going to order me a few boxes. These are much cheaper than the ones at the facility. I can't really start until I go grocery shopping, so I plan to begin this coming Sunday. As for my current program....I guess I'm really not on one. I'm just trying to watch what I eat. I weighed this morning and I'm still right where I was last week.

My pants story...

It's so funny that you posted your pants story, because the very same thing happened to me this morning and I was going to post about. My post was going to be titled "Who needs a scale when you have jeans?" Jeans have always been a great indicator as to how my diet's going. You always know that you've gained a few if you have to lay down to button them up! I pulled out a pair of 18 misses that were still pretty snug last month. I could get them on, but I could barely breath. Well, I needed to wear jeans today because I have to do some manual labor at work later. My other pair (18W) were dirty, so I went for the snug ones. I was shocked, they went right on and buttoned without any sucking in. They are even a little loose in the waist. I've only lost 1 or 2 lbs since the last time I tried them, but I've obviously lost a few inches too. Woo Hoo! It's a good day!! I may get brave and pull out my 16's this weekend.

By the way, I love the part about your "sucker in panties" - I can so relate!

Tiff,

Congrats on being the biggest loser!

I am so proud of you. 14 lbs is no easy task...it is hard work! You have no reason to be "disappointed" - you did awesome!!!

I'm The Biggest Loser!!!

We had a biggest loser competition at work which started about 3 months ago. I have been on and off dieting since then. Well total (including before the Loser Competition) I have lost 17 pounds!!! Well as far as the Competition goes I have lost 14 pounds!!! AND guess what...we had the final weigh in Monday and out of 10 people...I AM THE BIGGEST LOSER!! I last 5.38% of my body weight since the competition started! I was so excited that I won but disappointed because I know I could have done better had I tried harder! Oh well! Needless to say I am super motivated now and you will be seeing lots of me around here hopefully!!!

Oh Those Pants!!!

Yup those pants..you know the ones. You buy them and they really aren't that comfy but you think just a couple of pounds and they will be fine. Well I bought those pants...last year. I wore them once with those good panties that suck you in. WELL I have been SO busy lately that I forgot to wash work clothes and I was left with ...you guessed it...the pants! I couldn't find my good "sucker in panties" so I just had my regular ones on. I closed my eyes, slowly pulled them up, buttoned them without sucking in...WHAT...did that really just happen!! I run to the mirror and look to see if they really were "the pants" and guess what...they were!!! They are even lose in a couple of places!! Woohoo!! SO I had to share my pants story with you!!

Do any of you have a good "pants" story???

I'm stuck...

or in fancy diet terms, I have plateau’d . When I first began writing this post, I decided to begin by finding articles on the subject, so that I could figure out why I am stuck. Once I began reading, the answer was very obvious … I haven’t plateau! I’m just not doing what I was doing in the beginning when the weight went quickly. I’ve had myself believing I was doing well, and although I have been doing better than I was 6 months ago, I’m not doing as well as I was in the beginning. When I first begin I was...

…drinking 100oz of water a day; now I’m lucky if I get 50oz
…avoiding caffeine; lately I’ve begin drinking a diet soda everyday and 3 or 4 on the weekends.
…getting no more than 1250 calories a day: I now average about 1600
…walking at least 3 nights a week; I’ve only been 3 times in the last 2 weeks

So, this weeks goal are to get 100oz of water everyday, avoid diet soda, stay under 1200 and walk, walk, walk. I’m also planning to try Curves this week. The articles I read said that if you aren’t building muscle as you diet, then you are losing muscle along with the fat and that slows down your metabolism. So I’m hoping Curves will help me in that area.

Think you have hit a plateau? Take a step back and reevaluate what you are doing, it may just be a slacker disguised as a plateau.

Weigh - In Wednesday...a day late - Traci

212...ok 213, is in the right direction but I'm not celebrating until I get back to 208, my lowest on this journey so far.

So there were no donuts to battle this morning, but there was a huge Easter basket full of goodies on my desk this morning. It had a huge chocolate bunny, lots of candy and several other non-edible items. So cute! We all got one. They were from the diviion heads.

Well it's 3:00 in the afternoon and I've sat next this basket all day and only been tempted once...and I gave in. I caved...I ate the one and only peanut butter bon bon in the basket. It was goood. I had to eat it, Brayden hates peanut butter :) The rest will be recycled into his Easter Basket. I tried to find how many calories were in a bon bon....I'm estimating it was around 150. Considering that only brings my day's total to 500 so far, I'm not feeling too guilty about it.

Ding, Ding, Ding - Round 3

Somebody has so generously brought 2 dozen Krispy Kreme donuts to work for the last 3 days. They are in the kitchen right next to the fridge. That's the 1st place I go when I get here in the morning to put my lunch up. When I first walk in, I instantly think "Yea, someone brought donuts" and then that thought is immediatly followed by "Oh yeah, I can't have that" and then the following conversation ensues in my head while I'm fixing my morning cup of coffee...


Sensible Traci: "Don't even think about it"
Addicted Traci: *thinking about it* "So if it's 300 calories, then half would only be 150, not bad."
Sensible Traci: "You're going to kill 150 calories on 2 bites of a donut?"
Addicted Traci: "You're right, if I'm going to do it, I should just eat the whole thing!"
Sensible Traci: "Snap out of it, you CAN'T have it! Would you rather taste that donut or lose weight?"
Addicted Traci: *big sigh* "Oh all right, I won't have one"
Addicted Traci: *as I leave the kitchen* "Those skinny people just don't know how lucky they are"
Addicted Traci: *as I sit down at my desk* "I feel good that I resisted it, I mean come on, it's just a donut!"

I know it's good when "addicted me" starts talking like "sensible me". That's progress!

The battle of the bulge is not easy, but we can do it ....one donut at a time!!

Update

It's been a while since I've posted about the diet lifestyle change. I've been on a bit of a hiatus for the last month or so. Even though I have posted a few times that "I am back on plan", that's only been lasting a day or so before I slowly start straying. So for the last time, I am back on plan and have been for about 3 days. I'm back to counting the calories and staying under 1300. I started to gain a few when I quit counting. One day I thought I had done pretty well, but then went back and counted the calories and it was at 1800. I think my internal "calorie estimator" is off just a bit!!
When I was keeping it under 1200, the lbs were going. And even though it seemed slow at the time, 2-3 lbs a week is actually pretty quick. I'm watching the fat also and trying to increase the protein. I've started drinking a Slim Fast Low Carb Shakes (20g of protein) in the afternoon and it's seems to really help curb the hunger.
I weighed in at 217 on Friday, but I'm back down to 213 today. I'll make my "official" weigh in tomorrow on "Weigh In Wednesday"!

WANNA BE A LOSER?

To all of our loyal readers, you may have noticed that there is now an "invitation" on the sidebar. It's inviting anyone that is trying to lose weight to join the blog. So go read it and join us!Also, I went through and removed all of the daily stats. I'm still keeping track, but I'm tracking it on FitDay.com instead. It's just a lot easier.

Kitty On House Arrest!

Thought this was interesting - if it was a dog they would have already had him put to sleep though...yes I am a dog lover!

Residents of the neighborhood of Sunset Circle say they have been terrorized by a crazy cat named Lewis. Lewis for his part has been uniquely cited, personally issued a restraining order by the town's animal control officer.
"He looks like Felix the Cat and has six toes on each foot, each with a long claw," Janet Kettman, a neighbor said Monday. "They are formidable weapons."
The neighbors said those weapons, along with catlike stealth, have allowed Lewis to attack at least a half dozen people and ambush the Avon lady as she was getting out of her car.

Some of those who were bitten and scratched ended up seeking treatment at area hospitals.
Animal Control Officer Rachel Solveira placed a restraining order on him. It was the first time such an action was taken against a cat in Fairfield.
In effect, Lewis is under house arrest, forbidden to leave his home.
Solveira also arrested the cat's owner, Ruth Cisero, charging her with failing to comply with the restraining order and reckless endangerment.

I have a Personal Trainer!!

So, I'm gettting ready this morning and I turn on our Christian radio station. (you can listen live on the internet here - it's awesome) They are having their day of Praise and Prayer today. Basically people call in and talk about what God has done for them. The common thread was "God did it, I couldn't have done it with Him, I had to let Him take control." So let's just say I had a bit of a "come to Jesus" meeting this morning. It's like he was screaming "Let go, Let me - you cannot do this alone, but I can do it through you". I am sick of doing this alone. I can't do this alone, so here is my prayer for today and everyday from here on out.

Jesus, my Lord and Savior. As of today, I am turning this over to you. Push me aside and take this thing head on. Help me to conquer my addictions to food and give me the drive that I need to get the exercise program back on track. It is not your will that I be fat and miserable. It is your will that I be healthy and happy! Let Your will be done God. I give this to you. I am just going to sit back and let you move in this situation. I've said it before, but the control freak in me just can't let go. Forgive me for not trusting in you enough to let go. I want to let go. Teach me how to let go. I need you pick me up and take me through this. I love you and am believing you for health, strength and happiness. Not only do I want to lose weight, I want to learn to love myself more. Teach me to love myself. Surround me with positive, supportive people that will only build me up. I commit to you today to do whatever it is you speak to me. Amen!

I've said a thousand times that if only I had a personal trainer, I could do this. They could motivate me and be there to hold me acountable. But they are so expensive!

Well, God just spoke to me and said "You do have a Personal Trainer! I've been sitting right here next to you this whole time just waiting for you to call and sign up. The best part is that I am FREE!!! I paid the fee along time ago! I will motivate you. I will hold you accountable. I will teach you and guide you. I will walk with you every step of the way. I am your Personal Trainer! I don't ever close, I'm always here for you"

So I went to Ask.com and decided to type in "What is a personal trainer"?

Here are some excerpts from what I found...

A qualified trainer understands principles of anatomy, physiology...

A certified personal trainer is the difference in a successful fitness program...

A certified personal trainer is proven to be unparalleled in achieving desired fitness levels, increased motivation, and long term wellness...

So I am declaring today that God is my new Personal Trainer!!

Confessions of a Pig: Part I & II & III & IV & so on

I basically could have reposted the last post everyday since that post. Just replace Maple Nut Goodies with ice cream, fries, cookies, etc... I have just completely thrown the calorie counting, water drinking, walking, and healthy eating out the window. I gave up! We went on vacation last Thursday and we just returned yesterday. Of course the word vacation is defined as "permission to eat anything you want" in my dictionary. Here are just of the few "not so healthy" choices I made this weekend.... Moose Munch, Cherry Cake Double Take (1100 calories!!!!) , Corn Dogs, Yogurt covered Pretzels, Cocoa Puffs, Fries, Chocolate Chip Walnut Cookies, Sugar Cookies, Smoked Sausage, Kettle Korn, Truffle (just 1 though), chocolate covered fruit (just 2), chips and salsa, Chocolate cake & I'm sure there are a few more. Can you say "SWEET TOOTH". Now keep in mind all of that is over the course of 4 days - but still!! I had quite a rude awakiening this morning when I stepped on the scale and saw 214!! That's 6 lbs since the 8th!

How Goes It?

So how has everyone been? Things have been crazy around here so I haven't had much time to even email much less post!! Just thought I would put up a picture from a float we were on at the St. Patty's Parade. (Some of mine & my daughters friends - my daughter is on the far right.) Hope everyone is well! Talk to you soon - I hope!

OH By the way - Bombadil & Goldberry's sites are up and going and "safe" again! I just now got around to adding them back! Glad to know!

Confessions of a Pig!

Yes...I said PIG!! I just call 'em like I see 'em. While I was out on lunch today I bought a bag of Maple Nut Goodies....one of my fave candies. Well I took them back into work with me...big mistake! I ate a few here and a few there and before I knew it... the bag was empty! Yes, over the course of 4 hours I ate all 28 pieces. Guess how many calories are in one Nut Goodie......28 - that's 784 calories in that whole bag!!! OMG!! The sad thing is that I actually looked at the nutritional info before I started. I knew there were that many calories in that bag. Did that stop me? Nope! Well what's done, is done. I was going to weigh tomorrow....but I think I may wait a few days. I might pass out!!

Just So Ya' Know

I got an email from Goldberry saying that she and Bombadil were having problems with their blogs and for us not to visit them. Earlier in the week I had gone there and my spyware picked up the Trojan virus. It caught it thank goodness but she had just warned not to go there until they say otherwise. THEREFORE, until I receive confirmation from Chandra (Goldberry) I will take their links off the side bar to protect others. Hopefully, they will be up and running soon!

Wednesday Weigh In: Traci

Ear Stapling

SO I actually follwed a fad - I went and got my ears (yes both of them) stapled. Yeah I haven't always been the brightest one when it comes to weight loss! Ha! It sounds wild but you can read about it at www.staplepower.com and I am sure you can do a search on the web for it. Me and one of my friends went last Thursday. I have heard of several people losing weight by doing this and the lady that put ours in lost 10 pounds in two weeks. It does say it won't work for everyone but I am at my wits end and I SO hope it works for me! I told my hubby that it may just be one of those things that is "all in your head" but all I know is - whatever works!! If it takes me putting staples in my ear to make me think I will lose some weight then so be it! Ha! I have already lost 10 pounds since January and I am SO hoping that by our Disney trip in May that I will lose that much more! I will keep you updated through the journey.

Have any of you heard of this or do you know anyone who has had any success with it? I would be curious to know!

Long Time No Post!!

So where to begin...

I don't know if you have heard of this new weight loss craze of "ear stapling". At first I was like, "What...?" Then I know of some people that have had positive results from it. One of my friends and I went yesterday and had it done to both ears (you can read a little about it here www.staplepower.com) We don't know if it is going to work or not but hey at least we won't regret not trying! I will keep you updated on that!

When I originally started trying to lose weight back in August I was 262. By the time we started this I was down to 258. Since then it has been a roller coaster ride! When we stareted our Biggest Loser competition at work I was back up to 260. This morning I decided to weigh in (for the first time in weeks) just so I would be able to tell by next week if the staples are working or not and guess what.....I WEIGHT 250!!! I don't know how I did it but I have lost 10 pounds! Maybe because I have not been stressed about trying to lose weight so I finally did it! Now I am pumped and I want to SO bad see that number get below 250! Anyway - I have to get back to work but I wanted to briefly update you on my status!

By the way, have you talked to Aunt Teresea and your mom about joining the site?

Food Finds

Just some foods and drinks that I have found that are good low calorie choices:

Listed in this format:
Food(linked to website)/Where I buy them/Calories


Pastry Twists - Wal-Mart/60 per twist
These are yuummmy! Brayden and Bobby like them too, so I have to buy enough to share.

High Protein Fruit Drink - Internet/70 per packet and 16g of protein T
These are the drinks I used to have to buy when I joined the local "weight loss center". I've just now realized I can buy them online. The wild berry is my favorite. The WLC recommended 3 a day, but I'm planning to do 2 a day. I definetly need to get more protein in and this is a great way to do it.

Edy's Light and No Sugar Added Ice Cream - Wal-Mart/90-130 per 1/2 cup
I've mentioned these before, but they are worth mentioning again. I've only had the Light, but it is awesome, so I'm guessing the other has to be pretty good also.

Eggo Toaster Swirlz - Wal-Mart/120 (1 set of 4)
These are a great fix for the sweet tooth. There are lots of other choices on the Eggo site that are low in calorie (the key is eating only what the serving is)

1/3 Less Sugar Cereals - WM/120 for 1 & 1/4 cups
I loooovee cereal. I always thought that I needed to give it up if I was trying to los weight. What I need to give up is eating 2 huge full bowls of it. (please tell me I'm not the only one??) The serving you get for 120 calories is actually quite a lot. Add 1 C 2% milk and you only have a total of 245 calories. I love to eat the Fruit Loops w/o milk for a afternoon snack also.

Frozen Vegetables - WM / 60-110 per cup
Both Birsdeye and Green Giant make some great vegetable "side dishes". I can eat 2 servings of these vegetables for dinner and be stuffed and stay under 200 calories. I really like vegetables but hate the chore of making fresh veggies tasty without adding a bunch of oil or butter.

Today Even The Music Cries

You hurt me - I don't think you even know.
I try and try not to let my feelings show.
I am only human my heart so tender and easy to bruise.
Why can't you say I am sorry or my bad or hey girl I tried!
How I long for someone to stand up for me and be by my side.
No admission at all - now the tears start to fall.
What is that I hear? Is it the music or is it tears?
I guess today even the music cries.

Predator Among Us

It has been in the news lately that a sexual offender who was from here, then moved to Missouri, has been in prison and NOW is being released after only 4 months. The bad news is...
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HE IS MOVING INTO MY NEIGHBORHOOD!!!

It is scary to many of us because it is just a normal middle class neighborhood loaded with kids! Not to mention he will be a neighbor of someone I know! They have at least 3 school buses just for my daughers school. HERE is an article from when he was originally arrested in Missouri and HERE is a link from one of our local news channels.

As a mom of an almost 8 year old I am pretty upset about all of this! What is your take on it? How would you feel?

Weekend Update

I did pretty good this weekend. I didn't get any exercise, but I stayed within my calories. I didn't get much water though. I did breakdown and buy 3 boxes of Girl Scout Cookies... who can resist GS cookies? Especially when I was a GS myself, I did it for the girls, for the cause....(yeah right). I at least got the Low Fat Lemon ones....they are my fave. I'm going to allow myself 3 a day (130 calories). I got thin mints too, but B & B have already polished those off. By the way, I have a new goal... Bobby and I are going to the Nascar race in Charlotte, NC for Memorial Day weekend. That is my final goal date. (oh yeah we have decided to hold off on a baby until after then). I'm calling my new goal "Countdown to Green". Just in case you don't know, that's what they call the days/hours leading up to the race (green as in green flag - GO) That gives me 89 days (almost 13 weeks)....so my goal is to average 3 a week....for a total of 38 lbs. As of today's weight that would bring me in at 174. I would be extremely happy with that weight, even though I would technically still be considered overweight. I am going to really begin to study the Biggest Loser info and I'm going to commit to doing it for one week 100% (after I go grocery shopping this weekend). Not that I am quitting after a week, I just reserve the right at that point to switch up a few things based on my tastes and schedule. My main thing is going to be to stay under the BL's recommended calories for me. (1500) and to get 30-40 minutes of cardio 3 days a week and 3 days of "strength training. The exercise alone should make a big difference since I haven't really been doing any for the last few weeks. My weight loss goal for Wednesday is to be back down to 210.

Brad & Jen Finally Divide the Loot!

BRAD Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have agreed a multi-million-pound divorce settlement, Finally. The couple thrashed out the deal just over a year after they announced their split.

Friends star Jen, 37, will keep the 16.6million mansion they lived in for five years of marriage. The 12,000sq ft Beverly Hills property boasts eight bedrooms, six bathrooms, a pool, spa and tennis courts.

In return, Pitt, 42, holds on to the controlling share of their film company, Plan B Productions, believed to be worth more than 28million.
It's hot property after making 12 successful indie movies, including Tim Burton's Charlie And The Chocolate Factory. All I know is I really wouldn't mind getting either end of that deal!!

Food Find

You have to try these...they are so yummy and only 60 calories per twist. I've only had the california almond and original. They have been my little secret at home for a while.... Brayden and Bobby stayed away because I said they were good for you... good as in "better than the junk I would usually choose" Well last night I had them taste it.....big mistake. The entire bag was devoured by the end of the night.


By the way, I forgot to post my weight yesterday but it was back down to 211!!

Dunkin' Donuts!!

Ok, so I wrote that post and got all inspired and I haven't been back since... It's not because I haven't been on the program, I've just been so busy and haven't had a chance to get back here. So I'm here now. I'm excited about weighing in tomorrow. I just hope I'm back down to where I was a few weeks ago. I do have a confession to make. Someone brought in Krispy Kremes today and I took a raspberry filled one from the box and brought it back to my desk. I didn't want anyone to see me eat it (um, that's a sign that you have a problem), so I put it in a napkin and was going to wait until the room cleared before I ate any. Well thank goodness I did that, because the longer it sat there there more guilt I felt. I looked at it and imagined how good it tastes and in my head I said "screw it, I want that donut" and almost as soon as I thought that I thought - well you're not eating it...just throw it away...and that's what I did. I have just thrown a perfectly good Kripsy Kreme in the trash. I actually felt guilty for throwing it away because someone else might have wanted it and now I have taken it and trashed it - but you know what? Nobody else really needs that junk either!

I figured instead of putting a picture of the yummy donut, I'd put a picture of the nutrition label!!

Show Me The Weight Loss! Show Me The Weight Loss!

You had me at "I don't know what happened"! Reading that definitely gave me a Jerry McQuire moment! That was deep stuff but oh so true! I even had to send it to my mom! She responded with this:

wow that is so profound and inspirational and SOOOOOOOO TRUE! Tell her we will pray for her courage and ask her to pray for ours. To be brave enough to fight this giant. p.s. bet she got an "A" in speech class too!

I mean really that was SO true! Though I will say there has been alot in my life that I say I want but I really don't give 100%. I mean I really do want it but it is like I don't know why I don't try harder!! The thing is I DO deserve to do better than I do about alot of things! Plus, I mean how hard is it really to say no! I mean I say no to lots of other things that would keep me from reaching other goals so why is this so hard! I think you hit the nail on the head when it comes to almost feeling like a drug addict would feel! This HAS to be how they feel! We have got to do this! It is so important to us and it is just time! Every time I try to make an excuse I am going to remember the "speech" you just gave and say DOG GONE IT! I am WORTH this!! All I have to say about what you wrote is this!

*clap* *clap* *clap* BRAVO!

What A Blur!!

Things have been flying by the past week or so for me! It has been wild!! So what have I been doing you ask? Well....

Last Thursday
I had an assignment due in my biology class. Then that night my hubby, daughter and I went with my best friend's family to the Rodeo. The kids loved it! We also got to see Dierks Bentley while we were there! Hubba! Hubba!

Friday
A bunch of us were supposed to go out for my best friend's hubbies and mom's bdays but the birthday folks decided they didn't want to go. I ended up going to my friends house and eating some yummy steak & twice baked potatoes! We had to go over to visit her mom and tell her happy birthday and check out her soon to be finished/remodeled kitchen. We went and grabbed a couple of movies and then that was when I got the call. What call you ask? My husband - who is the the USCG and was on his way to drill several hours away - called and said, "Baby, I have bad news. I am halfway there and just realized when I dropped you off you left you keys in the ignition and now I have them with me!" OH NO! I was LOCKED out of my house from Friday night until Sunday night! My daughter was already spending the night with my friends daughter so I was invited to make myself at home for the night on their couch!

Saturday
I had to get up early while everyone was asleep and go buy me and my daughter all the necessities needed when you spend a weekend from home! I guess one good thing out of the deal is I got new clothes and make-up! Ha! After that I picked my daughter up from my friend's house and we went to my mom's. We (me, mom, daugher and 10 year old brother) rode to my 23 year old brothers house to check out all the work he has done! Then we went shopping & browsing! Afterwards we went back to mom's and had lunch and the adults napped while the kids watched a movie! Oh boy was it nice! That afternoon my friend called to see if I wanted to go out with a group of my other friends but I told her to go ahead and I would plan to join in the next weekend or so because I was going to go out to eat with my family and go watch Motocross! It was SO good! They do the coolest tricks on those motorcylces and 4-wheelers! I would be scared to death! Ha! My 7 year old daughter whats a motorcycle now. She liked them even before that night because her uncle has a room full of trophies from all of his motocross!

Sunday
My best friend called me around 8:30ish to update me on the night before and to find out if we were going to church. Since I was locked out I didn't have church clothes and she had a family function to go to with her hubby we skipped church for the week and promised to get back in the swing of things next week! My step-dad cooked us a great breakfast and then we went out to my step-grandparents farmhouse. They have horses and dogs everywhere! The kids had a blast. Afterwards we all went for pizza and then riding around looking for new cars! When we got back to my mom's I got my things packed together and was on my way to meet my hubby (who was coming back in town) and I got another call from him saying he had a little fender bender! No damage done so HOPEFULLY all will be fine! I was so glad to be home Sunday night - we even turned on the gas logs and just relaxed!

Monday
Back to work - I was SO tired from all of my going that weekend! I had to spend my lunch hour running around buying stuff for my daughters Valentine's party. After work I met my hubby & daughter for dinner and then I headed back to my best friends mom's house for our weekly Monday night meeting of watching The Bachelor! I got home and worked a couple of hours I was WIPED by the time I finally crawled into bed!

Tuesday
Happy Valentine's Day! I got up and got my daughter off to school to get a sugar high on all the candy the would be eating that day! Me and a friend met my mom and one of her friends for lunch. After work we went and met my whole "immediate" family to take my grandmother out for dinner for Valentine's day. It was a really wonderful time and with her Alzheimers I cherish every moment that we spend that way! I took her back to the nursing home and the hubby headed to the house. When I got home the hubby was cleaning up. My daughter went on to bed and the hubby allowed me to take a nice long, hot, bubble bath in the jacuzzi tub! After I got out I got a massage and some TLC from the hubby!

Wednesday
Went to work and then went home and worked some more! At bed time we realized my mini-schnauzers batteries for his collar for the underground fence must have gone dead. He had gotten out and we took 1 hour and 1/2 or longer looking for him! After my hubby found him we FINALLY got into bed!

Today
I am at work and super busy! Not to mention right after 5:00 I have an assignment for school due. Then I have to go home and work some more (I have really been putting in some O.T.!) and start studying for a check test that will be tomorrow.

Weekend Plans
My best friend is having a root canal done tomorrow so I offered to watch her daughter if she would like me to. Saturday if the weather is good I have to help my mom at my grandmothers house. Then we may get together with a bunch of our friends Saturday night and go out. Sunday morning Church of course and then Sunday afternoon hopefully some R&R! Somewhere in between all of that chaos I have to squeeze in some study time for my Biology mid-term next week!

Whew! So are you tired! I know I am! I guess I will talk to you later! If you don't hear from me until this time next week you know why! ;-)

What do you want??

I don't know what has happened. I was so gung ho for a while and doing so good and now it's like I have lost all my motivation. I weighed this morning and I'm up to 213....wrong direction!! I need to figure out where I fell off and jump back on while I'm still fit enough to catch the train! I'm not going to make any excuses, (even though I have a ton of them running through my head) The truth is I obviously just don't want it bad enough....but I do! Or so I think I do!!

How does that happen? How can someone want something more than anything in the world, but not want to do what it takes to have it. It's not like I'm 5'6" wanting to be 6'. I want something that IS possible, something that is as easy as just making the decision to do it. I will never understand it. If I had some horrible deadly disease and they offered me a cure, I would do anything it took to get the cure. I would think I was worthy of receiveing it. But somehow this disease is different. I like the way the disease tastes, I like the way this disease makes me feel (in the moment anyway). But on the other hand this disease IS killing me...slowly. It interrupts my livelyhood, it makes me cry, it makes me depressed, it makes me feel weak and unworthy, yet somehow the good feeling I get from it is more powerful then the horrible feeling it also gives me. It truly is like a heroine addiction (not that I know from personal experience) The more the addict does it, the more they want. When they do it, it makes them feel wondeful, but afterwards they hate themselves....but they continue to go back, over and over again.

I am worthy of this...WE are worthy of this. We are worthy of the money it takes, the time it takes and the support needed from those that love us.

I am robbing my marraige.
I am robbing my relationship with Brayden.
I am robbing my future.

I say there isn't anything that I wouldn't do for my child, yet there is...

CAN I do this? Yes
Do I NEED to do this? Definetly
Do I really WANT to do this? Honestly? I'm not sure. I definetly want to lose weight, but I don't know if I want to do what it takes to do it. If I did...wouldn't I be doing it? My body doesn't want to do it and I'm not sure that my mind is quite on board with the idea either.

They (who are "they" anyway) always say with any addiction that not only do you have to want it, but you have to want to do it what it takes to overcome it. I disagree.... I don't think I have to want to workout everyday for the rest of my life and I don't think I have to want to skip dessert from now on. If I waited until I wanted to do those things, then I'm not sure I would ever do it.

So the real question is.. CAN I do something that I really don't want to do? Do I have the inner strength to suck it up and do what it takes even when I don't want to do it? YES. YES I DO!!

and I have proof...

I stood in front of my college Speech Orientation class every Monday night and gave a speech. I DID NOT want to. I knew I wasn't good at it. I HATED it. But I dug down and found the strength to do it anyway. I did it because I wanted the "A" and it was worth it.

I made myself vulnerable and laid on a table, half naked for hours with my legs spread open in front of my husband, mother and a room full of complete strangers. I definetly DID NOT want to...but I did. I knew the reward was worth. Brayden was worth it.

I packed up my stuff and my son and left my husband after almost 5 years of marragie to go live with my parents. I DID NOT want to!! I loved him and wanted to be with him. I bawled my eyes out along the way, but I did it. As heartbreaking and scary as it was...I DID IT! I found strength in God, in my family and most of all strength in myself that I did not know was there. At the time I didn't know it would come to be one of the best things that ever happened to our marriage and probably the only reason we are still together today. So was it worth it?? Yes, even though at the times it was so hard and my heart ached! Even though I felt weak and wanted to give up sometimes.

So do I want to do all of the hard work that it takes? Want to? Not really. Will I? Yes. Because I know the reward will be worth it.

It will be really hard at times. There will be mornings when my muscles will ache as I climb out of bed. I will have moments of weakness. There will be days that I feel like giving up. So even though I really don't want to do what it takes... I know that I have the strength and the determination to do it anyway. I WILL do this...not because I want to... but because I have to. For Bobby, for Brayden and most importantly....FOR ME!!

I hope there comes a point in this process that I will actually enjoy exercising and I hope there comes a time when I enjoy passing on the dessert...but for now it's going to be all about inner strength and doing what I don't really want to do.

Do you REALLY want it??

What things have you done in life that you really didn't want to do?

Happy Valentine's Day!!

I HOPE YOU ALL HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

These roses are for each of you and they represent friendship! If any of you are giving roses today here are some helpful hints to make sure you are sending the right message! Enjoy!

Rose Color Meaning
Amaranth Red Long Standing Desire
Cardinal Red Sublime Desire
Carmine Red Deceitful Desire
Firey Red Flames of Passion
Black roses Death, Hatred, Farewell. Mostly used at funerals.
Orange and Coral roses Desire
Lavender/Purple roses Sublime Desire
Peach/Pale colored roses Deceitful Desire
Pink Roses Flames of Passion
Light Pink Roses Death, Hatred, Farewell. Mostly used at funerals.
Orange & Yellow Roses Enthusiasm, Desire, Passionate thoughts.
Yellow Roses Joy, Friendship.
White Roses Reverence, Humility.

Weigh - In Wednesday - Traci

So I am sad to say that I weighed in this morning at 212.2 Honestly I was expecting it to be higher after yesterday!! I've done good so far today and plan to do so from now one! I can really tell I worked out. I'm sore and I only did 20 minutes.

I really like the deskercizes you posted!! I'm going to try to do some!!!

BTW - You are doing a great job!!!

Deskercize!

I have done really good about exercising the past 3 days! I decided to look and see what I could find to ad a few more calorie burning activities in. I can across these three sites with some pretty good "Deskercizes". I am going to give them a try! What could it hurt!

http://www.ucop.edu/humres/eap/exercizes.html#anchor66636

http://www.dietbites.com/calories/dieting-exercise-desk-work.html

http://www.hooah4health.com/environment/occuphealth/exerciseatdesk.htm

http://www.webmd.com/content/Article/82/97478.htm

http://www.diabetic-help.com/workouts_at_your_desk.htm

WDW HERE WE COME!!

Woohoo! Our family vacation for the year has officially been planned! We are going to Walt Disney World. The hubby has been once, I have been twice and this will be my daughters first time! We are all so excited! Not to mention the fact that we have not had a "real" vacation in a long time! (I do suggest that everyone go at least once without kids!)

Other than that - just the usual - work, school and all else that comes along with being a mom/wife! We have tried organizing our house and getting some painting done. We hope to get our back fence put up in the near future - however; that might have to wait until after our trip! Alot of things probably will though!

What else, what else...ohhhh...we had a cook out at our house a couple of weeks ago and it was nice not to have to be the one to drive all over the world! Sunday we watched the Super Bowl at Brooke's house. This Thursday we are going to the Dixie National Rodeo and much to my daughter's excitement Dierks Bentley will be there! You know how young girls go gaga over these singers! Whew! I hope she outgrows that but being a women myself - I am sure she won't!

Hope all is well with everyone!

The Two Bad "W" Words of Weight Loss!

Those would be "Weigh In" and "Workout"! Ha! I finally got a fire under my back end this week! I walked (actually Gazelle) 2 miles yesterday morning and 1/2 mile last night. This morning I also got up and walked 2 miles. It takes me about 30 minutes right now to walk a 2 miles. I would like to work up to 1 hr a day. Yes 7 days a week! I would also like to add in my BL circuit training several days a week. THEN eventually I am going to add in weight training.

I have decided that I am not going to do a "Weigh In Wednesday" until February 22nd. It is going to be SO hard not to look at the scale every morning but I might get Brian to hide it from me! Ha! I just want to work out really hard for two weeks and see what a difference it makes. I am afraid if I keep looking at it fluctuating I am going to really discourage myself!

I am still sticking to "eating healthier" for now!

Good luck on your WW! A lady at work has lost 8lbs or so in a couple of weeks on WW. Another lady has lost about the same on South Beach. I just know me - I don't do well sticking to that sort of thing so I am going to have to do it the old fashion way! At this point it is just the fact that we are doing it - not how we are doing it! BTW - I really like your "fun" links! They were good for an afternoon pick me up!

We can do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fun Stuff!!

Some cool sites that I've stumbled upon: (not all diet related)

Virtual Pizza Parlor: - Just pick your crust, sauce and topping and it gives you the nutritional info. Very Cool!!

Baby Name Wizard: Just type in a name next to the > and it will tell you when the name was most popular.

Virtual Deli: Similar to pizza parlor, but for sandwiches.

Death Clock: A bit morbid, but in regards to your weight it's interesting to see if you lost weight how many years of life you might gain. I would gain 3-4 more years. And if I led a more optimistic life I would gain 11 years of life!!

Rubber Faces: Stretch the faces of your favorite celebrities.

Change of plans....

...diet plans, that is. I guess I haven't actually been on "a plan", but I've been counting calories. I've decided that I'm going to give Weight Watchers a try again. I liked it when I did it, but I hated keeping track of everything. But now that I haven't gotten in the habit of counting calories, I figure it's no different than leeping track of points. The thing with only couting calories is that I'm taking fat into consideration, but with WW I will be. I'm not signing up on the site or anything. I'm just going to follow the point guidelines. I know that you've done WW in the past, but I'm posting a link to some info just in case you forgot how many points for each weight range, etc. Just in case you want to give WW a second shot also. I also found this online points calculator. So my stats will still appear the same way, I'll just have points beside each meal instead of calories. At my current weight I get 26 points and then there are the 35 flex points. I'm not going to use the activity points.

Slacker!!

Ok, so I have really been slacking on the posts. I was doing so good about posting everyday but now it's been over a week! I've been crazy busy at work and it seems like we have had something going on every night this week!! I have done o.k. this week. I haven't been counting the calories, but I have still been eating healthy for the most part... there have been a couple of "treats" this week. I'm guessing I've been getting around 1800 a day. I weighed this morning though and I'm actually at 209. I think the 1200 was just way too low and that's why I plateaued so quickly. So Im shooting for 1500 a day. I'm still not 100% on the exercise, but I am doing better. Brayden and I actually got up this morning and went on a walk. We got outside and I remembered that Bobby took the car to work today, so we had to go without the stroller (it's in the car). It was cold and windy but he was quite the little trooper. I did however have to carry him piggy back the last couple of blocks. When we got home he said "ya know mom, that exercise felt good". I told him that from now one we would do it every Saturday, he was fine with that but insisted we take the stroller next time. That's probably best anyway. I could have gone a lot farther, but he was ready to come back to the house. Mom is coming to get him later today, so I'm going to go again after he's gone. Anyway, I'm back on the counting calories and posting bandwagon as of today. I am sooo glad to hear that you are "feeling it" now. It took me a good month or so to really put my foot down and decide to do it, but once I did it got much easier. It won't be long before we have awesome b4 and after pictures like the BL pics. I have a picture from August that I'm going to use as my before. I think I may put the same outfit on and take a picture of me now and post them next week. That will be my first b4 and after! I've lost a total of 20 lbs since then so you should be able to notice a difference. Keep on keeping on! You are doing great and I am very proud of you!! Love ya!!

Hello Strangers!

Hi guys and gals! I have been so swampped lately at home, work, school and well...life in general! I hope everyone is doing fine - I just wanted to stop by and say hello!! Running out of time to post so just wanted to leave you with this funny little note- Have A Great Weekend!

I'm Feeling It!

I am feeling so much better! I have felt so sluggish between being sick, recooping from the holidays and my new change to "the pill". My body is finally kind of relaxing and boy does it feel nice! I STILL haven't gotten into the exercise mode but Brian and I are going to work really hard Saturday on getting our house in order and all of our exercise equipment put in the extra bedroom. We SO need to do that. I am looking forward to his help in getting in the "exercise mode". It will make things alot easier knowing he is another person looking at me like "Okay Tiff get with it!" I think I have finally mastered the eating. For example I eat alot less every day, I cleaned out all of my cabinets and have lots of healthy choices, even our "snack" food is divided out and fat free, at Baylee's class party this morning I didn't have the first cookie or chip, I went to lunch with some ladies today and I did have some fries HOWEVER I did not eat even half of them and one of the ladies ordered dessert for us to share and I had 3 "very small" spoonfuls! That is the only day I really splurged though but I still didn't do too bad. I just feel I am getting the hang of - and actually enjoying! - eating better! There have been no complaints at home either! I have looked back at all your food journaling and you have done AWESOME! I am really proud of you! So (as I keep saying) I just HAVE to incorporate getting all of my water in everyday and exercising like crazy!! I am really going to try to take on some of Bob and Jillian's pointers that they have on the site:

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/dietcenter/downloads/

I also looked at this before & after photos of people that pretty much just did their own thing and lost weight by cutting back and exercising! Like you keep saying we didn't gain it overnight so we aren't going to lose it overnight! Hope these are inspiring to you, also!

BTW - If I haven't already told you *I really like your "No Excuses" post and agree with it 100%! and *I really like our before picture at the top of the site! Okay - by for now! Have a great weekend!!!!

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p129.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p123.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p110.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p105.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p11.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p36.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p40.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p44.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p51.shtml#photo

http://www.nbc.com/The_Biggest_Loser/weightlossgallery/wlg_p53.shtml#photo

Weigh In Wednesday!

Well I am FINALLY back down to the weight of one of my first weigh ins - 252! Woohoo! I don't know how I did it but I finally did! So that puts me back to losing 10lbs since I started this thing late last summer. Imagine had I really really stuck to it all this time what I could have done! I really don't know how I did it other than I have been busier and the fact that I stayed in the bathroom with a stomach bug! I am also a little bloated right now because of Uncle TOM so maybe it was more...who knows! As I keep saying I HAVE to add in exercise! I mean it is getting ridiculous! I HAVE to do this! I have done SO well today and I am going to stick to it tonight by getting some sort of exercise in! Even if it is only 10 minutes I am doing it!!

I started drinking those Lipton To Go Green Teas with my water at least once a day. Green Tea is good for you and it has no calories, sugar or artificial flavors!

I am also going to try this www.staplepower.com My mom personally knows someone that did it and lost 15 pounds in 2 weeks. It may all be in your head - but whatever works!!